I'm just curious if this is normal or not...
See I'm a very private person when it comes to relationships. I like to keep the problems in a relationship between myself and the bf, because I figure such personal info should stay between the two involved parties only.
Now my ex bf would always go squeal to his mom if we had any problems. Recently we broke up, and I will admit I was in the wrong for making threats to him. You know how it goes when you break up with an ex... things get heated, that sort of thing. Of course I never threatened any physical harm or that I would kill him, or even show up at his house, just that I would harrass him via phone/ email and try to make his life a living ****. Again, I admit I was in the wrong and should have kept my dumb mouth shut in the heat of the moment.
Next thing you know he shows up at my house with his mother, wanting to talk to my mom. My mom really didn't want to talk to them because she likes to stay out of other peoples business. Of course they kept banging at my doors and windows and kept that up for 5-10 minutes. She had to listen to his mother threaten to call the cops on me, etc. Of course my mom was upset, and I feel like a **** for making her go thru that. I agreed to buy her some nice perfume for her troubles.
But what do you guys think?
He's 23 years old, in case that makes any difference.
Would you ever have your parents fight your battles for you?
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- 03-24-11, 11:56 PMrubym_713Would you ever have your parents fight your battles for you?
- 03-25-11, 12:45 AMridesno159
What a (insert word for a cat, or a body part that only females have)!
I think he needs to man up and deal with his own problems, and not let others try to fix them. He's an legal adult (has been for a while), he should start acting like one. Blabbing to his mom like that is pathetic, and even worse that she came to your house like that. The word momma's boy comes to mind here...
It doesn't matter if you were in the wrong or not, admitting shows you're much more of an adult than him. I think it's great you got out of that relationship, I hope you stay away from him for good. Best you got out now though, imagine dealing with that when the relationship gets more serious...
I've been looking for a girl who will actually admit when she's wrong, they're hard to find, you'll make a great catch for someone. Looking for a new bf from Minnesota by chance? ;)
Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com - 03-25-11, 01:36 AMrubym_713
My mom always told my brothers and I that who we date and what we do is none of her business because we were adults already, and that was our problem that we needed to take care of on our own.
I told my ex (who we will call Trey) that any problems we have should be kept between us two. I never even told my friends about any issues I was having with him because it's just not right in my eyes!
But... Every single time we had an argument, or I broke up with him, he would get his Blackberry (lol, and yes he's a Crackberry member) and speed dial his mom. I would tell him, "I don't want to talk to your mom. I don't owe her an answer. I'm not dating her." But he would say that it was her business, because she let me into her home, I spent the night there a few times when it was cold at my house, and I ate there often. Well, he came to my house often and he ate here sometimes, but gosh, that still doesn't mean he owed my parents any answer.
I regret opening the door to him and his mom earlier today, but he and his mom threatened to bring his dad into the mix if I didn't... and he's a scary looking man. They said if I didn't open the door, they would just keep coming back until I did. They were banging on my doors and windows, and it was starting to get annoying...
As for his reason on why his mom just had to talk to mine, she "needed to make sure I was alright." But that was a bull. The real truth is that he is an aspiring psychiatrist, but he is diagnosed with his own mental problems (psychosis and paranoia) and his parents feel the need to protect him and his reputation so that he can succeed in life.
You know how I know? He was recording our entire email conversations, and he had the nerve to use his Blackberry to record our conversation at my house. The funny thing is, when he first walked into my room, I held a tape recorder in front of him and said "I need to record this for safety purposes" but he walked out of my room and refused to speak. It wasn't until I put it away and showed him that I wasn't really recording him, that he talked to me (while secretly recording me on his Blackberry)!!!! As soon as I saw the blinking red lights on his phone, I knew what he was up to and kicked him out. That's when he brought his mommy. - 03-25-11, 01:42 AMrubym_713I know I'm not 100% in the right, not even 50%, but unlike him, I can admit to my mistakes. He never could. In his eyes, he could do no wrong, but maybe that's just because of the way his parents raised him, who knows. I hate people like that.
At first I was sad about the break up, but seeing my mother cry earlier today and say "I don't want them in my house anymore" made me see that the right choice had been made. He wanted to marry me, but thank God I dodged that bullet.
Yup, I'm in the market for a new bf, but sadly I'm all the way over here in TX. :(
Thanks for cheering me up, though. - 03-25-11, 02:07 AMridesno159
WOW! Just WOW...
It sure doesn't take a doctor to realize he's crazy. Doesn't sound like the most trustworthy person either.
When he sees this thread will he be crying to mom again?
That's funny you say he wants to be a psychiatrist if he can't even deal with his own issues and needs to run to mom for help. How is he going to even help others when he can't even help himself? Is he going to break the law and talk about his work to mom?
My advice... Break all ties with him and move on, find a new guy that isn't a boy and can deal with his own problems.
Some people, maybe he should be seeing a psychiatrist instead of his mom...
Edit: oh just seen your other post, yea I'm sure the weather change would be difficult for either of us, glad I could cheer you up though :)
Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com - 03-25-11, 02:15 AMrubym_713Well if you're ever in my part of the country, or vise versa, we could chat over some coffee. You seem like a cool guy.
- 03-25-11, 09:11 AMpkcable
Part of it, is the parents NEED to care for their children, and their inability to let us go once we have grown. You are fortunate that your parents (or at least the mom you mentioned anyways) is NOT that way, BUT most parents are like "Trey's. Fortunately most adults do our best to balance parents meddling and keep it at a bare minimum. I pick my battles. ;) I've found sometimes it IS ok to let mom, "mother" me. In this case thou, your ex is 1000% wrong to involve mom!
- 03-25-11, 09:21 AMhighjakker
how did you guys manage to go out and stuff? i mean, didn't the umbilical cord get in the way???
- 03-25-11, 03:00 PMSCrid2000
I've heard of lots of girls who're like that, but not so many guys.
IMO, once you're done with high school and either a) have a job or b) go to college (and you should be doing one of those two as soon as you graduate) your parents need to treat you as an adult.
I'm the same age as your ex, and while I would certainly talk to my parents about stuff like that, they certainly wouldn't do anything about it, and I'd be outraged if they did. - 03-25-11, 09:47 PMRootbrian
**** no, I fight my own battles. Don't need to involve any family members at all.
Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com - 03-26-11, 05:55 AMhootyhoo
These are
Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com - 03-26-11, 07:49 PMrubym_713He hid it pretty well until the end, I guess. :p