[BigBadWulf]

I thought you guys were tending for tips?

::::reaches in pocket and hands Jef contents. Jef looks, sees note and reads "I'm with stupid", arrow points at him::::

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[cnorton]

::::coughs::::
Excuse me?

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Already gone

[JustPlainJef]

HEY WOLFIE!!!!!!!

That wasn't nice! Come on man, habe you *seen* anyone say "and here's a little something for you!"

Blondie, always happy to make the ladies laugh.



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[BigBadWulf]

!

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[Username0223]

So, uh, Shelli, apparently my afternoon just freed up. What are you doing this afternoon?

awww...snap! You leave me on the back burner and because YOU have nothing to do....now you call upon me?!?!

Ok-whatta ya wanna do??? Wait--do I get flowers too!!!

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[Back-space]

awww...snap! You leave me on the back burner and because YOU have nothing to do....now you call upon me?!?!

Ok-whatta ya wanna do??? Wait--do I get flowers too!!!

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You're so needy

[Username0223]

Morning guys! Just passing through . I'm driving around, trying to get some experience before I go take my G2 . See you guys later

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good luck brad--and remember no posting & driving stay safe

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[Back-space]

good luck brad--and remember no posting & driving stay safe

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Naa, I actually try my hardest to tdrive properly Not going to act like an �diot and end up hurting somebody. Unlike some people I know.....

[JustPlainJef]

Yes.

...*sends Shelli flowers, paid for with Ex's credit card*...

[Username0223]

You're so needy

yea yea ---- whatever!

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[Back-space]

Yes.

...*sends Shelli flowers, paid for with Ex's credit card*...

yea yea ---- whatever!

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You guys are such suckers

[Username0223]

Yes.

...*sends Shelli flowers, paid for with Ex's credit card*...

nice flowers but ahhh.... Do you ever use your own credit card!!! Mike's gonna kick your but when he finds out!!! Lmao

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[Username0223]

Naa, I actually try my hardest to tdrive properly Not going to act like an �diot and end up hurting somebody. Unlike some people I know.....

good glad to hear that cuz I hate when someone next to me or in front is busy texting or talking on their stupid phone!!!!!!!

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[Back-space]

good glad to hear that cuz I hate when someone next to me or in front is busy texting or talking on their stupid phone!!!!!!!

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We just had a 17 year old die in our area doing that. Thankfully he ran into a tree. It's not nice when anybody dies, but atleast he didn't swerve into oncoming traffic and kill somebody else. That text message couldn't have waited 2 minutes? You put everybody elses lives in danger over that? That's what worries me about getting a bike. Just a matter of time before an �diot runs me over.

[JustPlainJef]

I'd rather deal with Mike than my wife....

OK, OK....

...*cancels charges on Mike's and Nort's cards, cancels orders, sends each of the ladies 3 roses*...


Yeah, I guess that would be the right thing to do... Stealing is wrong...

...*loads a case of Cuervo Gold into my trunk*...

[Back-space]

I'd rather deal with Mike than my wife....

OK, OK....

...*cancels charges on Mike's and Nort's cards, cancels orders, sends each of the ladies 3 roses*...


Yeah, I guess that would be the right thing to do... Stealing is wrong...

...*loads a case of Cuervo Gold into my trunk*...

*Looks around for people, starts unplugging Wolf's computer* I wont say anything if you don't I need a new computer

[JustPlainJef]

Dude, we don't get deliveries of computers every day, dumba$$!!!

Well, if his computer was missing, he wouldn't know what else was missing.....

...*hits BS over the head with a frying pan*...

Hey Wolfie, he stole a case of booze and tried to steal your 'puter.....

Did I say a case? I meant three cases.

...*loads Captain Morgan and some Effen vodka in my Jeep*...

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[Back-space]

Dude, we don't get deliveries of computers every day, dumba$$!!!

Well, if his computer was missing, he wouldn't know what else was missing.....

...*hits BS over the head with a frying pan*...

Hey Wolfie, he stole a case of booze and tried to steal your 'puter.....

Did I say a case? I meant three cases.

...*loads Captain Morgan and some Effen vodka in my Jeep*...

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You moron! Do you not see all the security cameras the mods hooked up in here?! I was simply taking the computer to Best Buy to get it checked for viruses.

[JustPlainJef]

Why would you do that? I'm a computer tech by trade, I setup the cameras and the computers.....

!diot!

...*hits BS again for good measure*...

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[Back-space]

I gotta take a nap. My eyes just don't want to stay open I'll catcvh you guys later.

[Back-space]

Why would you do that? I'm a computer tech by trade, I setup the cameras and the computers.....

!diot!

...*hits BS again for good measure*...

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*Shoots Jef in the knee, then in the other knee* Next time you should make sure the guy you're going to hit isn't on medication Are those sirens? Think it's time for me to take my leave. Have fun diggin two half inch bullets out of your legs See you later

[JustPlainJef]

I'm going to go home and do that too... Got a la�e softball game, then work early...

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[JustPlainJef]

Luckily I still had on my gear from umping yesterday!

...*puts tracer on BS's car, shows the cops the shinguards with the bullets in them, gives the cops the remote to find BS*...

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[KasiCatastrophe]

I'm getting ready to finally get myself some sleep. It's not a nap but may as well be since I'll be up again in a few hours.

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[BergerKing]

Welcome to Chapter 10.

We made a port call to the Philippines in July. Olangapo. Sailors paradise. LBFMs and games of smiles. "I love you, Joe".

Now, Olangapo is the city where the Navy went to party. This city could digest the entire crew of a carrier battle group with over 7000 thirsty, lonely, hungry sailors in need of one-on-one entertainment.

Or...whatever.

We enter port on a steamy July morning, the moisture making us look like a clowder of wet cats. Our spirits were high in anticipation, but we knew they would be letting us off for a Ship's Party that evening.

We worked hard in the grueling sun. Shirts off, we busted our buns on the hot forecastle, sweat making us look as if we'd been dipped in 10w-40.

The sun crawled its ponderous circuit through the sky, time was mired in a molasses bath, and we felt the same. It seemed like forever.

Cranes moved supplies aboard. Boxes, cans, sacks, bags of mail, parts. Men worked like ants, getting us re-loaded for the upcoming free time. It was the 1st fresh milk we'd seen in a month, along with fresh fruit and veggies.

We had sliders(hamburgers) for lunch, with fresh veggies, and glasses of ice-cold milk. For dessert, soft-serve ice cream called autodog,(lift his little tail for your treat, boys and girls!) chocolate and vanilla.

Back to work, re-energized, the day finally concluded with"Sweeper, sweepers, man your brooms," and soon therafter, Liberty Call. Hot doggy!

I got dressed and headed for the main gate. 2 miles walk in the waning light. I wanted to enjoy the sights, so I walked.

I didn't carry but a couple of dollars because the beer and food were free that night. Saved me the worry of getting rolled outside the main base.

But I'd miscalculated. I wore a jacket that was inappropriate in town! They wouldn't let me go, told me I'd have to go back and change.

So, back I went, heat sapping me with every step. Changed, and went back to the gate, and was given the OK.

I walked across the bridge, and for the 1st time, saw why they called the estuary by the colorful term "Schitt River". Small boats were being paddled under and on either side of the bridge, and in them, small chidren and mothers would beg for us to toss them coins. I flipped a couple out, and they performed remarkable acrobatic feats catching and diving for them

Into the streets I wandered, and beheld amazing sights.

Bar, after bar, after pub, after club, after disco, holy Schnike! A party animals' paradise.

And the streets? Lined with women.

I'm not passing judgment or condoning what it is, merely reporting facts.

Sing-song voices, I love you Joe, you wanna party?
I love you long time! I love you short time. Buy me drinka! I lova you. And when I blushed at the, obvious connotations, there voices would cry "Cherry boy!". Maybe to that world, but that's another story, not to be told here.

In a haste, I made it to the bar, a club roughly the size of a football field, where the ship had booked the party.

After 9 miles of walking, too much sun and humidity, I was thirsty and hungry, and quite dizzy from the whirlwind and mental OVERLOAD!

I climbed the stairs and joined the maelstrom. Bodies swaying, dancing, thrashing, twisting, yelling, talking, and 150 decibels of pulse-pounding rock-and-roll!!!

"Where's the beer" I screamed at a buddy of mine, and he pointed out the line. I grabbed a burger and whammo'd it, then hit the soda cooler before I got to the brew.
San Miguel beer isn't bad, but it's strong. Runs 8 to 18% alcohol by volume. I grabbed 4, by the neck, two in each hand. And I began the Great '86 beer chug. I made 7 trips, pouring them down my throat as fast as I could.

On the seventh trip, I could only handle 2. I was thoroughly trashed. I'd once managed 17 3 years before. (Dad's idea) 26 went down my abused gullet that night.

And I wasn't done yet.

I staggered out onto the balcony after leaving a sample in the head, and the guys greeted me with a large pitcher of mojo, a lovely native drink that tastes like kool-aid and kicks like Francis the Mule.

I shouted "Mooooojooooo!"

And chugged the entire pitcher.

They handed me another, down it went, and now things...were...getting...futhy....

A glass was hand to me, I pulled it toward my mouth and it fell from my hand, exploding in shards on the patio. A 2nd, same fate. Someone handed me a beer, 1 sip, CRASH.

At that point, one of the chiefs grabbed me, and pulled me inside before I could fall off the balcony. He told me it was time to leave. I sid I just got here, but it wasth, otay, thief.

He assigned an escort to me, and I staggered out of the bar, glad to be headed back.

I was there for an hour.

We went down the street, and I wasn't...exactly...walking. More like meandering. My escort kept asking me if I was alright. Yeth, I wath allll-riiiight.

So, I walked smack-dab into the side of a parked Jeepney, he grabbed me, I said thanks, took one more step and BLARRRGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!

Painted the nearest wall and blacked out.

************************************************** *************************

I struggled awake to find 6 guys trying to stuff me into my bunk. It was dark, and I could see very little. For those that don't know, a navy rack is only slightly larger than your average coffin. With one side missing. They struggled because I had to be laid face-down. Don't lay a drunk face-up.

I giggled and chuckled. I'm a happy drinker, unless tequila is involved, then you need a taser or small steel cage.

The guy in the lower bunk kept telling me not to barf. Then a guy named Goodman got in my face (hated him) and told me not to puke or I'd clean it up.

I said otay, and gave him a faceful.

And blissfully fell asleep.


I will have to write the epilogue, to tell you how this story ends. Stay tuned!

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