1. Buzz_Dengue's Avatar
    Storm4 Development & Launch Details Leaked
    By Hugh Jorgan - Buckeye News Service

    An errantly addressed email has divulged the upcoming details of the release of the Blackberry Storm4 through an undislosed source.

    It appears that the basis for the accelerated development cycle, is RIM's almost negotiated and finalized corporate takeover of "Body Glove". The Rodondo Beach, California company has a business unit specializing in mobile phone snap on cases. This appears to be the coup de grce in the Storm4's development.

    "We have, in conjunction with our partners at Body Glove, developed the finest product ever offered by RIM/Blackberry" details the correspondence. "We now possess the ability to apply a snap on Blackberry case to ANY model of Android, Window, Google or Apple iPhone model giving our customers the user experience that up to now, they have only dreamed about"

    The apparent operating system for the Storm4 (identified in the email only as "Chameleon 2.3") is based on the recently disclosed "BB App Translator" The email continues, "The difficulty in getting the iPhone to look and behave like a true BB took an epic programming effort on behalf of our launch team and was by far the toughest hurdle we had to overcome, but we did it!"

    "We have programmed as part of the "App Translator" from other platforms into the Storm4 the ability for the keypad to randomly freeze, "Uncaught Exception" errors to appear at least twice a day, the touch screen to frequently ignore being tactily stimulated and as part of the snap-on case, it is now even more difficult to do a hard restart, accomplished by obstructing the battery cover."

    "The business model we have developed and implemented has been christened as ' Lag, Implode, Abscond & Retreat' (or LIAR for short)", chronicles the rouge email. "It will carry the BB Storm product line far into the coming years." As far as carriers for the launch of the Storm4, Sprint, Verizon, AT&T nor T- Mobile have any plans announced to carry the new bastion of the RIM/Blackberry line-up. "We expect people to clamor for the product and create a groundswell that the carriers cannot ignore" states the top RIM management at the close of the informative email.

    http://www.scathingsarcasm.com
    Last edited by Buzz_Dengue; 07-25-11 at 03:07 PM.
    sportline and chiefbroski like this.
    07-25-11 11:56 AM
  2. chiefbroski's Avatar
    Haha. Funny stuff man.

    Add a few new features:

    -Ability to have negative available memory
    -Larger clock icon when loading
    -Inconveniently placed convenience keys

    Blackberry Storm 4 "Lite" model comes with black paint and a sticker with a Blackberry logo .
    Buzz_Dengue and CGI like this.
    07-25-11 12:31 PM
  3. sportline's Avatar
    hahaha
    Buzz_Dengue likes this.
    07-25-11 12:39 PM
  4. Mr.Conviviality's Avatar
    lolz.....
    07-25-11 02:23 PM
  5. chiefbroski's Avatar
    Hey Buzz-Dengue, love the BBStorm2 (yeah, I know) for your device information. LOL
    It's like its mandatory for us Storm users to apologize for our purchase. I have a love/hate relationship with my Storm too. At least yours it a Storm2!!! I needed a touchscreen blackberry, because I wouldn't buy any other phone and I couldn't afford the torch until my contract is up. LOL....man I love my Storm with it's lag and its zero memory. It stands up to sooo much abuse!
    Buzz_Dengue likes this.
    07-26-11 09:39 AM
  6. 1magine's Avatar
    I personally will never buy a device that doesn't take at least 10 minutes to re-boot. If they add that, I'll consider it. Also - must shrink every screen to 2.8" or below; big screens are the devil's playground.
    Buzz_Dengue likes this.
    07-26-11 10:55 AM
  7. Buzz_Dengue's Avatar
    Hey Buzz-Dengue, love the BBStorm2 (yeah, I know) for your device information. LOL
    It's like its mandatory for us Storm users to apologize for our purchase. I have a love/hate relationship with my Storm too. At least yours it a Storm2!!! I needed a touchscreen blackberry, because I wouldn't buy any other phone and I couldn't afford the torch until my contract is up. LOL....man I love my Storm with it's lag and its zero memory. It stands up to sooo much abuse!
    Hey back to Chiefbroski & 1magine...
    Yes, my first exposure to BB products was my Storm2-9550... my phone restart time -honestly- is 13 to 15 minutes from pulling and replacing the battery, until it is useable. I call certain people ahead of a hard restart to let them know I will be incommunicado for 1/32nd (3.125%) of my work day because of restarting my phone and to reach me on an alternate number if feasible... I still have over a year until a no cost swap out is possible to another device... oh, joy.

    Owning a Storm or Storm2 makes a person sound like a raving lunatic. People simply can't believe the stories we tell from using, or trying to use, our phones. Other BB users think you are grossly exaggerating the situation, since their phones apparently work OK. The whole litany of Storm & Storm2 "touch screen" issues alone needs its own forum.

    Oh well, If we can't handle it with humor(?) then it is that much harder to smile!
    chiefbroski likes this.
    07-26-11 02:48 PM
  8. 1magine's Avatar
    Agreed. A horror show. Though I had friends and colleugues who bought the Tour and they were none to happy either.
    07-26-11 02:52 PM
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