02-07-12 12:14 PM
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  1. BigBadWulf's Avatar
    Granted! You get the most amazing stew recipe in history. Chefs from all over come to learn your secret. Unfortunately, PETA gets wind of your plans, and after years in court, you're forced to create Rabbit Acres, where they all live merrily and multiply.

    I wish I had a rabbit's foot key chain.
    04-01-11 09:18 AM
  2. sabisgeek's Avatar
    Granted, but that rabbit's foot is connected to a rabbit, and you must wear the key chain on ALL the time, or you walk around naked. Your choice.

    I wish I had BIS.
    04-01-11 09:58 AM
  3. the_sandman_454's Avatar
    Granted, but the genie thinks you mean a Breathing Inhibition Synthesizer,which randomly turns on and off, determining when you can breathe or not.

    I wish I had a puppy
    04-01-11 10:31 AM
  4. sabisgeek's Avatar
    Granted, but the genie thinks you mean a Breathing Inhibition Synthesizer,which randomly turns on and off, determining when you can breathe or not.

    I wish I had a puppy
    Granted, but the puppy has an extra chromosome, and ends up being genetically mutated, to the extent that it has EXTRA long carnissal (?) Teeth, which it uses to bite the **** out of you.

    I wish I had Blackberry Internet Service for free.

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    04-01-11 10:43 AM
  5. cerealberry's Avatar
    Granted... All the BIS you can hope for... Free.. In fact your carrier will pay you for every kb you use.... What could be better?!? What? What's that? BBs found to cause cancer of the thumbs? All models discontinued and recalled..... Rim bankrupt? You loose both thumbs and must rely on a jitterbug?!? Gosh darnit....


    I wish I had an oscar meyer weiner pencil top for my eraser.

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    04-01-11 12:26 PM
  6. highjakker's Avatar
    granted! everytime you use it though it smears weiner oil all over your paperwork and it leaks it's smelly juice all down your pencil.


    i wish for three more wishes.
    04-01-11 01:15 PM
  7. jlb21's Avatar
    Granted. But in a denial of service fashion, each wish becomes 3 more wishes, which become 3 more wishes, etc. until the wish granting system is overloaded and crashes.

    I wish the PlayBook was out now!
    04-01-11 01:34 PM
  8. sabisgeek's Avatar
    Granted, but you will never be allowed to touch one of them, let alone buy one.

    I wish I never had to sleep.

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    04-01-11 01:37 PM
  9. Seijuro's Avatar
    granted, but now you'll always hear your mother going at it with her new boyfriend when you'd usually be asleep.

    i wish i had the bold touch right now
    04-01-11 01:43 PM
  10. highjakker's Avatar
    granted! now everything you touch becomes bold....


    i wish i had 400 pounds of gold at home.
    04-01-11 02:15 PM
  11. the_sandman_454's Avatar
    Granted, but when they're delivering it, they drop it on your head from a ridiculous height, which is fatal.

    I wish I could wander by after that happens and collect the gold safely.
    04-01-11 04:03 PM
  12. highjakker's Avatar
    granted. but as you get it all loaded in you car and begin to drive you get car jacked by some thugs wanting new "real" gold grillz....


    i wish i had a nice cold newcastle brown ale right about now.
    04-01-11 04:41 PM
  13. the_sandman_454's Avatar
    Granted, but one tastes like another until you're in a drunken stupor, then the genie draws obscene pictures on your face with a permanent marker while you're passed out.

    I wish I had one shot of bourbon.
    04-01-11 05:29 PM
  14. SCrid2000's Avatar
    Granted, but one tastes like another until you're in a drunken stupor, then the genie draws obscene pictures on your face with a permanent marker while you're passed out.

    I wish I had one shot of bourbon.
    Granted. Unfortunately, the pictures on your face are even more obscene.

    I wish I had a lifetime supply of cheesecake.
    04-01-11 11:38 PM
  15. sabisgeek's Avatar
    Granted, but your house is now infested with rats and there is no way to get them out.

    i wish i was a moderator
    04-01-11 11:48 PM
  16. middbrew's Avatar
    Granted. You become a moderator and as your first action you ban your self for life.

    I wish I could swim the English Channel.
    04-02-11 01:41 AM
  17. the_sandman_454's Avatar
    Granted, unfortunately nobody on that freighter saw you until you got caught in the propellers.

    I wish you left me in your will as beneficiary before your epic failure of a swimming trip.
    04-02-11 04:39 AM
  18. cerealberry's Avatar
    Granted.. You became sole heir to the estate of middbrew.. Unfortunately you not only assume all asset, which consisted of only a collection of potato chips in the shape of famous people's noses.. But also you inherit all debt... Millions in debt.....

    I wish someone would bring me coffee in bed

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    04-02-11 07:22 AM
  19. the_sandman_454's Avatar
    Granted, someone brings you coffee absorbed in a bed.

    I wish someone would buy me a new car.
    04-02-11 08:44 AM
  20. sabisgeek's Avatar
    Granted, but it's one of those tiny models that go for sale for $1.99.

    i wish someone would buy me a REAL car...and that i had a driver's licence
    04-02-11 08:56 AM
  21. the_sandman_454's Avatar
    Granted, but the first time you try to drive anywhere you get carjacked and now you have no car anymore...

    I wish I could live with myself if I let my morals slip enough to feel good about taking other peoples' posessions.
    04-02-11 09:09 AM
  22. middbrew's Avatar
    Granted. You no longer are remorse for your actions of thievery. This in turns displeases the judge in your grand theft trial and she adds on ten more years to your sentence.

    I wish I had x-ray vision.
    04-02-11 10:17 AM
  23. the_sandman_454's Avatar
    Granted, but every time you look at something or someone, the intense burst of radiation vaporizes them. You're eventually convicted of many murders for this, and the sentence is to have your eyes sewn shut.

    I wish I had a geiger counter.
    04-02-11 11:18 AM
  24. SCrid2000's Avatar
    Granted. Unfortunately, you forgot to replace the battery. You thought everything was going fine, and had no warning of middbrew coming up behind you. You learn that radiation poisoning is a slow and painful way to die.

    I wish for a million wishes.
    04-02-11 03:49 PM
  25. middbrew's Avatar
    Granted. One million people get a wish, but you don't personally get one.

    I wish Scrid would get a wish.
    04-02-11 04:44 PM
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