02-07-12 12:14 PM
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  1. the_sandman_454's Avatar
    Granted, but tomorrow Pepsi will decide to stop making Mountain Dew all together.

    I wish someone would go to work for me tomorrow
    Granted but your boss is so impressed with their work that you get fired and they get your job.

    I wish I had a penny for every time I got a junk email.
    03-28-11 10:23 AM
  2. sabisgeek's Avatar
    Granted, but the pennies are worthless now as the US Treasury has decided to remove all coins under 50 cents, and they are not doing any payback or exchange scheme for the coins under 50 cents.

    I wish I had the biggest house in the universe

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    03-28-11 10:27 AM
  3. middbrew's Avatar
    Granted. You own the largest home in the universe. Unfortunately it is on the moon and Sandy owns that so you are stuck paying him the cost of renting the space the house sits on (and we know he's asking way too much for rent up there). You also do not have any way to get to it because space travel isn't the norm yet.

    I wish I had those little pills from the movie "Limitless".
    03-28-11 10:55 AM
  4. rubym_713's Avatar
    Granted, you get the pills from "Limitless", but they are just the prop pills and thus are pretty much useless.

    I wish (that only) the hair on my head grew one foot a week, and once I got it at the length I wanted I would just donate the excess to Locks of Love everytime.

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    03-28-11 11:29 AM
  5. the_sandman_454's Avatar
    Granted, you get the pills from "Limitless", but they are just the prop pills and thus are pretty much useless.

    I wish (that only) the hair on my head grew one foot a week, and once I got it at the length I wanted I would just donate the excess to Locks of Love everytime.

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    Granted but they cure both cancer and baldness so nobody needs your hair, and you end up having so much you trip on it continually since the hair care folks don't want to deal with the mountain of hair you've already given them much less the new hair you're growing.

    I wish I owned stock in the hair clipper companies.
    03-29-11 05:50 AM
  6. sabisgeek's Avatar
    Granted, but the conditions for buying them was that the shareholder had unlimited liability for the business's debts. Of course, since people only buy nail clippers once in their lives, the business fails, leaving you to pay all the debts, which requires you to sell your house and all your belongings. In the course of 2 days you are reduced to sleeping under a bridge.

    I wish Sandy doesn't die while fighting the other homeless people for control of the sleeping area under the bridge where he now lives.

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    03-29-11 06:25 AM
  7. cerealberry's Avatar
    Granted... Sandy, the ever resourceful and charming person somehouw convinces you to allow him to couchsurf "just for a few days".... Days turn into weeks.. Weeks to months and soon you have a depressed, unshaven, unshowered sandman permenantly planted in your home... His only possessions of value are the 3.8 million nail clippers he has brought with him....

    I wish the genie would bring me a nice hot cup of coffee. Creak and 2 sweet and lows, please

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    03-29-11 06:37 AM
  8. sabisgeek's Avatar
    Granted, but Sandy mistakes the coffee cup for a garbage can, and guess what? He's putting those nail clippers to good use.

    I wish I can take that image out of my head.

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    03-29-11 07:17 AM
  9. jlb21's Avatar
    Granted. But now all you can think about is the nasty, fire-hose-like puking scene in Monty Python's The Meaning of Life. And to top it all off, the song that you now have stuck in your head too is "Every Sperm Is Sacred"!

    I wish the Python guys were younger so we could have them in their prime again!
    03-29-11 09:29 AM
  10. highjakker's Avatar
    granted...but now their humor is lost on the younger tv execs and they have been banned from airing in any country...reruns included.


    i wish customers would learn to close the GD door!!
    03-29-11 09:52 AM
  11. jlb21's Avatar
    Granted. But they leave the refrigerator door open.

    I wish that people
    would learn to speak in haiku
    what fun that would be
    03-29-11 01:00 PM
  12. SCrid2000's Avatar
    Granted. People learn.
    But since our schools are so bad
    They have trouble counting to 5.

    I wish American $ was worth more than Canadian $

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    03-29-11 05:02 PM
  13. hootyhoo's Avatar
    Granted. People learn.
    But since our schools are so bad
    They have trouble counting to 5.

    I wish American $ was worth more than Canadian $

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    Granted. But now the green back is worth less than Ecuadorian Sucre.

    I wish I was on vacation.

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    03-29-11 05:24 PM
  14. the_sandman_454's Avatar
    Granted, however, your vacation has unfortunately taken you to Libya where both Quadaffi's forces and the rebel forces both call a truce long enough to both focus on annhilating you.

    I wish all the world's oil would have been in the Western hemisphere.
    03-29-11 07:37 PM
  15. sabisgeek's Avatar
    Granted, but there was a fire that went into a cave that contained dead twigs and leaves left there by campers, and it blew up the oil and destroyed all of the Western Hemisphere, except for Canada.

    I wish I was the Ontario Finance minister so I could have his Playbook!!

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    03-30-11 01:24 AM
  16. highjakker's Avatar
    granted. it and all of it's contents are now yours and yours alone...that is until some 12 year old hacker made it all public....including that video of you with that moose...yuck!


    i wish i recieved 3% of the total for each barrell of oil pumped from the middle east.
    03-30-11 08:42 AM
  17. sabisgeek's Avatar
    Granted, but Sandy moved all the oil to the Western Hemisphere, and that fire blew it all up, so you basically get nothing.

    I wish that I was awesomer than Barney Stinson.

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    03-30-11 09:59 AM
  18. jlb21's Avatar
    Granted. But...wait for it...............


    I wish Lost was still on.
    03-30-11 10:48 AM
  19. highjakker's Avatar
    granted....but all the original writers and actors have moved on and the cast is now headed by the guy who played steve erkle and tanya harding.


    i wish it women had to go topless every other day of the week while indoors.
    03-31-11 09:43 AM
  20. cerealberry's Avatar
    Granted.. Too bad its the same days of the week that men are banned to the outdoors... Dang curtains are shut!!!


    I wish I didn't have a 10am meeting

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    03-31-11 09:58 AM
  21. jlb21's Avatar
    Granted. But now you are fired.

    I wish there wasn't going to be snow tomorrow.
    03-31-11 10:36 AM
  22. sabisgeek's Avatar
    Granted, but it's boiling hot, and several people are admitted to the hospital for severe burns.

    I wish my vacation went on forever

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    03-31-11 10:53 AM
  23. SCrid2000's Avatar
    Granted. You'll spend the rest of your life in a little hotel room with only a suitcase of clothes; you'll very quickly exhaust all your savings and be forced to live on the streets as a vacationing hobo.

    I wish I could find a freakin awesome deal on a new laptop under $500.
    03-31-11 08:58 PM
  24. the_sandman_454's Avatar
    Granted, but your car dies, house needs a bunch of work or the county will condemn it, and someone offers you an ostritch which you cannot refuse. Unfortunately you can't afford the computer now.

    I wish I had magical powers...
    03-31-11 10:26 PM
  25. highjakker's Avatar
    granted! but the only magical thing you can do is pull a rabbit out of your hat and each time it's a new rabbit and since no one wants some magically conjured up rabbit you can't get rid of them and they keep multiplying and the humane society is breathing down your neck now.


    i wish i had a kick a$$ rabbit stew recipe.
    04-01-11 09:06 AM
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