02-07-12 12:14 PM
2,778 ... 5758596061 ...
  1. cerealberry's Avatar
    Granted... But it is made out of soylent blue and you get terrible samonella from it and spend the next several days stuck to the toilet, never knowing which "end" was going to erupt next.......

    I wish I could go on a date w/ grown up dougie howser,,, (NPH)

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-23-09 06:43 AM
  2. 12MaNy's Avatar
    Granted, but it turns out to be the NPH from the Harold and Kumar movies and you wake up the next morning in a bathtub full of ice with one of your kidneys missing.

    I wish I had the ability to seal people's mouths shut with just a snap of a finger.
    01-23-09 10:53 AM
  3. cerealberry's Avatar
    Granted... But while at a beatnik folk concert... You begin snapping to the music.. Next thing you know everyone's mouth is permenantly sealed shut

    I wish there were no stupid people in this world

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-23-09 03:22 PM
  4. Blkbear's Avatar
    Oh **** you don't ask for much do you?

    Granted, all the stupid people turn into dogs and cats, while all the dogs and cats turn into people. This seems like a good trade, until all the "NEW PEOPLE" start licking their private parts where ever they happen to be at the moment.

    I wish I was one of the OLD no stupid people.
    01-23-09 07:32 PM
  5. cerealberry's Avatar
    Granted..... But I get to be one of the "new" non-stupid person and have a much more enjoyable time.... Who needs a partner when you can "lick yourself"

    I wish I was a contortionist

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-23-09 08:10 PM
  6. RavenMaverick's Avatar
    Granted! But you remember when your mother said "Your face is going to get stuck like that". Well, while entertaining some circus freaks your nightmare comes true. You are stuck with your head almost literally up your ***. You DO enjoy yourself for a while, until the beans and broccoli revisit you!

    I wish Cereal had some BEANO!

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-23-09 11:27 PM
  7. mbudden's Avatar
    Your wish is granted, but your cereal actually has beans.

    I wish I was able to get some sleep.
    01-24-09 01:17 AM
  8. RavenMaverick's Avatar
    Granted! You finally fall into a deep REM sleep but your body throws you into a long hibernation period. When you wake up the entire world has changed drastically. You emerge from your home and enter your new life as a modern day caveman!

    I wish proof of alien life REALLY existed.

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-24-09 01:23 AM
  9. cerealberry's Avatar
    Granted.. In fact when you open your closet this morning you find 15 tiny green aliens milling around... Unfortunately, they abduct you and have their alien way w/ you for days.. When you are finally returned to earth, you are so screwed up that you turn to alcohol to sooth your mind and become a homeless bum who mutters constantly warning others of alien abductions... But of course, who is going to listen to a crazy drunk homeless person?

    I wish kangaruex has alien std vaccinations

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-24-09 06:37 AM
  10. the_sandman_454's Avatar
    Granted but unfortunately they're developed too late to be helpful in this case, and various things become little and green like the aliens were.

    I wish I had some Bailey's irish creme for this morning's coffee.

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-24-09 07:05 AM
  11. cerealberry's Avatar
    Granted.... But as you go to open the bottle and pour it into your steaming hot cup of joe... You knock the mug w/ your elbow... Spilling that boiling hot coffee right into your lap... Too bad you didn't get your coffee at mcdonalds... Now you have no one to balme but yourself for your permenant crotch burn!!!

    I wish I had some coffee for this morning's baileys!!!

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-24-09 07:27 AM
  12. the_sandman_454's Avatar
    Granted but it is the kind some rodent-like animal in a foreign tropical jungle poops out. Due to the rough economy, they didn't wash your batch of coffee beans prior to grinding them up for you, so you now have rodent poo flavored coffee.

    I wish I had a kite to fly on such a breezy cold day as this.

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-24-09 07:48 AM
  13. Blkbear's Avatar
    Sandman first off Eeeeewwww!

    Granted, only problem this is a huge kite and you take off into the wild blue freezing cold yonder, flying high into the sky. (hey someone should make a song outta that!) Oh and when the wind stops blowing... you get to find out how Jack felt on that hill with Jill.

    I wish I was on earth, as Superman for 48 hours without any kryptonite of any type, within 9000 light years of earth. No one dies due to my superpowers, and I get to have fun fun fun, till the genie takes my powers away!
    01-24-09 11:27 AM
  14. cerealberry's Avatar
    Granted..... But the beachboys sue you for copyright infringement

    I wish my dog was an olympic champion

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-24-09 01:11 PM
  15. RavenMaverick's Avatar
    Granted! Your dog is an Olympic champion but only in the special olympics for dogs. Your dog needs a seeing eye dog!

    I wish I had some bacon!

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-24-09 03:41 PM
  16. Blkbear's Avatar
    Granted you now are surrounded by bacon, cooked bacon, raw bacon, all sorts of flavors of bacon. Only one tiny problem, you woke up this morning being a person of a faith that does not allow you to eat meat of any kind. To even touch meat, will cause you to burst into flames. Eating meat will kill you and anyone unlucky enough to be within 50 miles of you.

    I wish I could dance like the stars (heck like a monkey would be fine too).

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-24-09 05:52 PM
  17. RavenMaverick's Avatar
    LMAO! I can't touch meat of any kind???

    Your wish is granted and you can dance better than anyone... Including a monkey! But, the only job you can get is dancing at the "Bunny Farm". People start treating you like a piece of meat which is fine for a while, but suddenly the emptiness is closing in on you and the lonliness is more than you can take. The "Man" will not let you out of your contract so you are forced to saw your own legs off and go into hiding.

    I wish blkbear had good prosthetics!

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-24-09 07:11 PM
  18. matrodriguez's Avatar
    Granted except I don't know exactly what you mean by prosthetics so I can't grant your wish.

    I wish I had a BB data plan to send PIN messages on :[
    01-24-09 07:43 PM
  19. RavenMaverick's Avatar
    Granted! But you start to get inundated with pin messages! They arrive about 2 every second. You can't sleep, eat, or even go to the bathroom! You start to hate getting any messages at all and decide to flush your BB and all the contacts in it. To bad that those contacts also have your mailing address...

    I wish UPS would send a whole truck full of packages to my home and let me pick what I wanted to keep!

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-24-09 07:55 PM
  20. -FeistyCJ-'s Avatar
    Granted, but all the packages contain returned Storms

    I wish I was on a tropical beach, staying in a resort!
    01-24-09 08:08 PM
  21. jdoc77's Avatar
    Granted but the resort is next door to GITMO and after they shut it down, all the enemy combatants come to stay with you. They think the "American Nurse" is an evil infidel and throw you in the bay with a windsurfboard and tell you to sail back to America...

    I wish I had some vanilla ice cream and cuban cigars... ya, go with it.
    01-24-09 08:19 PM
  22. -FeistyCJ-'s Avatar
    lol..funny stuff...

    OK...granted, but the cigars and ice cream are mixed together, you eat it anyway and you get sick, requiring an endoscopy.

    I wish I was the GI nurse assisting in JDoc's endoscopy
    01-24-09 08:46 PM
  23. jdoc77's Avatar
    You ARE that nurse, and the GI gives me some propofol and fentanyl and excuses himself and says, "You're a good nurse... and he's a bad doctor, teach him a lesson..." When I wake up, it's like that joke about Vaseline and camping... and there's lipstick on the endoscope...

    I wish for more propofol and fentanyl!
    01-24-09 09:20 PM
  24. -FeistyCJ-'s Avatar
    Granted, you get more propofol and fentanyl...for the colonoscopy you requested, but when you awake the pictures you are shown are NOT of your colon.

    I wish I was more professional and didn't use the camera on my Storm during JDoc's colonoscopy....lol
    01-24-09 09:35 PM
  25. jdoc77's Avatar
    Wow.. I was really hoping it was an upper GI... *gulp* Hard to explain the lipstick now...

    Well dear Carol, you ARE more professional and refuse to use your storm during MY colonoscopy, but damned if those little endoscopes don't have very good cameras themselves... and while you are pretending to do the white balance on the camera... you snap several photos of "El Kabong" if you know what I mean...

    I never live it down, I drink myself into oblivion and now am a second chancer in a Canadian health plan...

    I wish I could get my license reinstated!
    01-24-09 09:49 PM
2,778 ... 5758596061 ...