02-07-12 12:14 PM
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  1. jdoc77's Avatar
    They Do! Unfortunately there is a government conspiracy to make sure that nobody knows this. "look at the pen sir"... *poof*

    I wish to be reinstated! lol.
    01-20-09 11:58 PM
  2. Blkbear's Avatar
    Granted, you are now reinstated, but alas you are reinstated as a garbage collector in Nome Alaska.

    I wish to win all the hot stuff eating contests I enter this year.
    01-21-09 01:41 AM
  3. RavenMaverick's Avatar
    Granted! You win your eating contests. But you have one 3 times a day everyday and they all end the same way as the one on Stand By Me did! Ewwww....

    I wish it was Friday.

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-21-09 06:01 AM
  4. cerealberry's Avatar
    Granted.. It is friday.... Grouind hog day to be exact.. Over and over and over again... And each day.. Andie mcdowell still could care less about you...


    I wish I had jdoc's "special" pen...

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-21-09 06:31 AM
  5. RavenMaverick's Avatar
    LOL! Granted! You have jdocs special pen but everytime you try to use it you hold it backward therefore you lose your memory! You roam the streets not knowing who you are or where you are going.

    I wish for my own "Government Bailout Plan" LOL!

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-21-09 06:39 AM
  6. cerealberry's Avatar
    Granted..... After being passed unanimously by the house.... It is introduced into the senate... Unfortunately, the jr. Senator from minnesota, al franken takes this opportunity to filibuster until the senate agrees to tag on a paragraph making it mandatory that al becomes the permanent host of snl...
    So the bill eventually dies in committee..

    I wish I could be the new jr senator from IL

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-21-09 06:52 AM
  7. RavenMaverick's Avatar
    Granted! You are the new jr. Senator. You had to beat out Al Franken for the job. They put a new rule in the job title itself that requires you to perform all of your duties as Stuart Smalley. Months later Al requests a recount and wins the seat back by one lone hanging chad.

    I wish I had some bacon and eggs for breakfast!

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-21-09 06:59 AM
  8. Leon_Ledbetter's Avatar
    Congrats......here is your green eggs and ham (it's green because it's been in the fridge for 6 months!)

    I wish I hadn't sold that mint '65 Mustang!
    01-21-09 12:57 PM
  9. the_sandman_454's Avatar
    Granted, you still have it, but the girlscouts steal it thinking it was made from mint. They grind it up and bake it into cookies. When they get sued they sue you for misleading them in the first place.

    I wish I wasn't partially evil.

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-21-09 01:48 PM
  10. vndlewis's Avatar
    Granted, you are 100% evil.

    I wish I had something to eat for lunch.

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-21-09 01:53 PM
  11. the_sandman_454's Avatar
    Granted but its mystery meat on a bun. And it tries to eat you first.

    I wish I could run for political office and use the slogan "Why settle for the lesser evil?"

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-21-09 01:56 PM
  12. Blkbear's Avatar
    Granted and by gum you win! And now that you have reporters sniffing around for dirt, none of your long times friends want to have much to do with you these days.

    I wish that stupid engine check light had not come on last night, and I'm hoping it really was just a loose gas cap!!!!
    01-21-09 02:51 PM
  13. the_sandman_454's Avatar
    Granted, it was a loose gas cap but since you didn't check that the engine was there, it voids the manufacturer's warranty.

    I wish I could drive the reporters away with all my evil.

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-21-09 03:45 PM
  14. RavenMaverick's Avatar
    Granted! It was just the gas cap. But you can't ever get the cap back on. The engine light causes the car to blow a fuse and the spark ignites the fumes leaking into your car. Then you are only left with a bonfire and some smores.

    I wish I had an antique bathtub!

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-21-09 03:45 PM
  15. the_sandman_454's Avatar
    Granted! It was just the gas cap. But you can't ever get the cap back on. The engine light causes the car to blow a fuse and the spark ignites the fumes leaking into your car. Then you are only left with a bonfire and some smores.

    I wish I had an antique bathtub!

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    Granted but its such an antique and very rusted out, so when you try to step into it, your foot goes through, you suffer severe cuts and nearly die from not having an up to date tetanus shot.

    I wish I had my own submarine.

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-21-09 04:35 PM
  16. vndlewis's Avatar
    Granted, but when you took it out to sea you discover it was a sub sandwich.

    I wish I was not working because I don't have to instead of not working because I can't find a job.

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-21-09 04:39 PM
  17. the_sandman_454's Avatar
    Granted but the reason you don't have to work is because you have found favor with the sultan of a small country and you get the privelledge of being a member of his harem.

    I wish I had some happy pills.

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-21-09 05:42 PM
  18. cerealberry's Avatar
    Granted.... They are the size of nilla wafers and there is not a drop of liquid around.... You become angrier and angrier as they taunt and tease you until you loose it all together and are taken away on a 72hr psych hold..

    I wish I had a 24K gold blackberry... I would call her goldie!

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-21-09 06:27 PM
  19. RavenMaverick's Avatar
    Granted! Your golden blackberry was made from gold smuggled out of Ft. Knox. The feds are looking everywhere for you. You accidentally kill one of them when you are trying to escape. You end up on Death row Na await the governer's call for a stay of execution... That will come in on "Goldie".

    I wish I had a time machine!

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-21-09 06:45 PM
  20. cerealberry's Avatar
    Granted... But I borrow it to turn back time and return goldie to ft. Knox.. However... Hav ing never navigated a time machine before.. I accidently crash it into leif erickson's viking ship... Sorry, my bad

    I wish I drove time machines better

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-21-09 06:49 PM
  21. RavenMaverick's Avatar
    Granted! But Leif is still pi**ed and puts you into the dead man's chest!

    I wish I had night vision.

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-21-09 06:57 PM
  22. cerealberry's Avatar
    Granted.... But you wind up looking into your neighbor's bedroom late at night.. Your 82 year old wrinkley, saggy neighbors.. Who, unbeknownsed to youn happen to be swingers and are entertaining some friends from the local nursing home.... Now you wish you could burn your retinas!!

    I wish I had a vespa to zip around town with!

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-21-09 08:48 PM
  23. RavenMaverick's Avatar
    LOL! That is too much.

    You have your zippy little vespa and you can't help but feel like a sexy mutha in it! Sadly the honeymoon ends early as your vespa is going down the same road the Yugo did! You can't find any parts you need to save her. You are left walking at a crossroads nearing midnight alone and ready to make a deal...

    I wish I had a private chef!

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-21-09 09:10 PM
  24. the_sandman_454's Avatar
    Granted but the secret ingredient the chef prefers to use in nearly everything he/she makes is bat guano.

    I wish I had a source of bat guano I could use as fertilizer for the lawn.

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    01-21-09 09:21 PM
  25. -FeistyCJ-'s Avatar
    Granted, but your lawn is then destroyed by mole crickets

    I wish for great sex...lol
    01-21-09 09:37 PM
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