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Come on Pink, I was just thinking earlier how nice it would be, if you contributed. You have such a unique way with language.hey carol!
aaawwwww.....come on - dont be a party pooper - - do share please!!! LOL
you guys crack me up with this stuff--i cant write half this good-you guys have some imagination! thanks for the entertainment!05-21-09 08:58 PM - Granted! She did indeed ask for German beer instead! She got all the beer she desired! Unfortunately, maybe a little too much beer! She drank beer day and night. As if it wasn't bad enough she drank so much beer she acquired a hideous beer belly...one night she got so intoxicated, and in her drunken stupor she stumbled into a tattoo parlor. She begged the artist "Please, Pease, Please help me hide my big beer belly!" Sadly, The tattoo artist did the best he could...thinking he had given her the gorgeous gut she pleaded for. But, did he?
EEK!
"One day I wake up and find her dead in her bed. I had come to care deeply for the woman who I was helping to survive, and her passing hits me hard, and I curl up next to her and I don't leave her until I too pass on to join her in the afterlife......"
I wish something GOOD would happen to me in this Genie thread!Last edited by Carol64; 05-21-09 at 09:22 PM.
05-21-09 09:03 PM - And, now, to get the thread back on track...I do believe my wish was next!
Granted! She did indeed ask for German beer instead! She got all the beer she desired! Unfortunately, maybe a little too much beer! She drank beer day and night. As if it wasn't bad enough she drank so much beer she acquired a hideous beer belly...one night she got so intoxicated, and in her drunken stupor she stumbled into a tattoo parlor. She begged the artist "Please, Pease, Please help me hide my big beer belly!" Sadly, The tattoo artist did the best he could...thinking he had given her the gorgeous gut she pleaded for. But, did he?
EEK!
"One day I wake up and find her dead in her bed. I had come to care deeply for the woman who I was helping to survive, and her passing hits me hard, and I curl up next to her and I don't leave her until I too pass on to join her in the afterlife......"
I wish something GOOD would happen to me in this Genie thread!05-22-09 03:38 PM - Granted, you don't have to go to Iowa cereal, because Iowa is coming to you! Yes all 50 residents, along with 2 million head of corn, 150,000 head of cattle, half a million chickens, 68,000 swine, 5,900 sheep, and sadly not a single dang flamingo. Also along for the ride are the ghost of Patrick O'Connor, a miniature likeness of the Sergeant Floyd Monument, and a contingent of 1850's period Germans. The ensuing caravan clogs up the highways and byways from Des Moines to Chicago. No one can get anywhere, and word gets out why. Major media is at your doorstep 24/7, asking you everything from what your connection with Iowa is, to how many ways you can use an ear of corn.
Your neighbors hate you, your state hates you and the corn is nervous, very nervous. In the end you realize how much you'd like to escape to Iowa yourself.
I wish they would bring Hawaii to me.
Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.comLast edited by BigBadWolf; 05-22-09 at 07:08 PM.
05-22-09 06:54 PM - We have flamingos at our very sad little zoo in our very sad little capital. Here in good old Idiots Out Wandering Around.Granted, you don't have to go to Iowa cereal, because Iowa is coming to you! Yes all 50 residents, along with 2 million head of corn, 150,000 head of cattle, half a million chickens, 68,000 swine, 5,900 sheep, and sadly not a single dang flamingo. Also along for the ride are the ghost of Patrick O'Connor, a miniature likeness of the Sergeant Floyd Monument, and a contingent of 1850's period Germans. The ensuing caravan clogs up the highways and byways from Des Moines to Chicago. No one can get anywhere, and word gets out why. Major media is at your doorstep 24/7, asking you everything from what your connection with Iowa is, to how many ways you can use an ear of corn. Your neighbors hate you, your state hates you and the corn is nervous, very nervous. In the end you realize how much you'd like to escape to Iowa yourself.
I wish they would bring Hawaii to me.
Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
You get Hawaii but it crushes you and half the city killing hundreds possibly thousands (depends on where you live LOL).
I wish I was at at home with my husbandLast edited by ineedhelp118; 05-22-09 at 09:12 PM.
05-22-09 08:54 PM -
Wish Granted! Well...err...ummmm...kinda!
Jef does get the superglue he needs to put himself back together!
Unfortunately, Jef was never very sharp at putting puzzles together.
Poor Jef now has not only one leg, his long flamingo neck is twisted and he can now put his head up his a$$.
I wish my heart was incapable of being hurt.
.05-24-09 07:31 PM - Granted! Carol does finally feel Phillipo's burning love for her. Sadly he also has a few other things that burn for her as well!
Carol and Phillipo quickly fall in love. They set a date for the wedding and have decided not to have any sexual relations until then. But, we all know how that goes! Who would buy a car without test driving it first? LOL!
Phillipo does fine with that, but Carol can not stand it anymore! She begs Phillipo to take it to the next level the night before the wedding.
After many refusals Phillipo gives in. Carol runs to the bedroom and Phillipo is dragging behind. She jumps into bed and waits for him to join her. He finally arrives and Carol is in full anticipation. She hears him pull off his shoes. She decides to get up and help him disrobe.
She unbuttons his shirt and gets a strong odor of fermented garlic! She is confused but continues on because she is just so excited. She tries to block out the smell.
She reaches down to unbutton his pants and dust with the scent of boiled cabbage comes out. She dry heaves and is not sure she can go through with anything at this point. Was this why he didn't want to do anything until they were married?
Phillipo is standing there in all of his naked glory smelling up not only Carol's house, but the whole block. The dog in the backyard has heaved and his eyes are watering. At this point Carol's eyes are the only thing that is moist.
He makes a move to get in her bed, and she all but slaps him to keep him from ruining her sheets. She demands an explanation. Phillipo has a rare disease. He cries out "I have Dust Bowl Cabbage Crotch".
He begs for her love! She can not feel anything for anyone else besides this now rancid creature! She is at a loss. She doesn't want to be alone, but she doesn't want to walk around with a man that could gag a maggot.
She falls to her knees and weeps at the irony of it. Could she ever learn to live with this smell?
I wish Carol would find a cure for Phillipo so she won't be alone forever!
Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com05-25-09 01:34 AM - Granted! Carol's Phillipo has searched the world over for a doctor with a cure. He stumbles upon a well renowned physician from the Phoenix area, who seldom visits the Genie (slacker). It is he, and he alone who can cure this most wretched disease. Days are spent, putting the entire hospital and surrounding infrastructure in lock down. Jdoc does X Rays, CAT scans, MRI's, EBT's, Fluoroscopy, Endoscopy, Ultrasonography, Elastography and even Ballistic Optical Imaging to get to root of the matter. Days turn into weeks, while Jdoc consults with other experienced Cabbage Crotch physicians. They come to one conclusion, and one conclusion alone. The crotch must be removed. He assembles a team of nurses and doctors, all of whom have anosmia, making it much easier to function in such a stench. The surgery is grueling, and all appetites are lost. Finally after a 20 hour stint Phillipo is brought out to the recovery room. Never in all his days did he believe he could be relieved of this most dreaded of diseases. But alas, as he stirs from the anesthesia, he discovers that is not all he has been relieved of. How will he ever face his loving Carol again. Will she accept him as he now is, stench free and crotchless. Stay tuned to the next installment of "Carol Get Your Crotch" or "Stenchless and Fancy Free" or "The Young and the Stenchless".
I wish Carol the best with her new found love.05-25-09 07:11 AM
gee thanks wolf!
