....who was his mentor. He believed that eating brains would make him smarter but it backfired and all he could think about was Flyers. Every night he had nightmares of flyers and zippers on pants worn by Boston men. The sound of the zipper haunted him. He could not sleep anymore so he went to.........
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....group sessions where he listened to other people's horrible afflictions with their conditions, mainly having to do with licking the ice off of the blades from the flyers hockey skates and this pleased him and he was able live out his fantasies through their miseries. In one such session he met a woman named...
Brumhilde, who had some particularly disturbing fantasies involving being the Flyer's goalie but doing it naked with only a mask and enjoying being hit with the puck...
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....but her only set-back was that she liked to stand in goal backwards and never knew when the puck was coming, which slightly added to her excitement.
but she likes the pineapple too... When she introduces herself to the group, someone always likes to make the crowd giggle by cracking a joke about how she likes to be pucked...
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..by a fruit. They called her the pk fruitcake lover. She was embarrassed and needed help so she went to the doctor. The doctor was no help as he told her a pineapple a day will keep the doctor away. She begged him to............
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.....no help since his name was Dr. Mango. The name was giving her bad flashbacks and she killed the doctor and stole his pink scooter. She rode off to see......
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......the scooter was so jolted from the caffeine and sugar it drove off by itself before she could get back on it. She waited on the side of the road for hours for someone to stop and give her a ride. Finally a..............
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........far to a circus in a disclosed area full of freaks. There bearded lady just died from a tragic accident by trying to shave but she cut her neck and bled to death. The circus needed a replacement so they locked the lady up and fed her hormones and waited for her to grow a beard. The hormones were not working though, so they...........
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shaved themselves and then collected up those hairs to glue onto her face to form the beard. She was horrified at what they'd done, but at the same time, excited to finally be able to earn money...
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...without having to tie a mattress to her back anymore. The only thing she didn't like about her new facial hair was that some of the "whiskers" were suspiciously curly and smelled like crotch but being an optimist she...
....so she made a peephole in the locker room and waited for the circus freaks to shower so she could see them naked and find out if they shaved off any of there body hair. The only problem was the freaks never seemed to shower. She came back to the peephole three days later and found........
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...a peeenis poking through with the words "glory hole" written over the now enlarged peephole. Not knowing what to do she poured some hot sauce on the phallyc, which she just so happened to be carryng in her purse because...
she likes spicy food and carnies eat mostly cabbage so, it isn't normally very spicy. The carnies all blamed eachother for this incident and killed eachother. The last one alive was depressed that all the other freaks were gone and jumped off a cliff...
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...but he was known as "the rubberband man" and just bounced back atop the cliff. So he just left the canival to the fake bearded lady and bounced on down the road singing....
...he decided to wait on the side of the road and hitchhike a ride to the city. A car stopped and it was the bearded lady. She got most of the hair off but still had glue all over her face. He begged her for a ride. She said why should I give you a ride after what you have done to me. He replied, I'm rubber you're glue whatever you say bounces off of me and sticks to you. She was fascinated by his rhyming skills and decided to give him a ride. They drove to.......
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