betty on and forgot all about the burger wars. they were so entranced with....
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betty on and forgot all about the burger wars. they were so entranced with....
television, until their stomachs all collectively growled as one, causing the earth to shake and rattle things on shelves... This reminded them again about their rage caused by lack of tomatoes on burgers and...
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they went to Wendy's and asked "where's the beef-steak tomatoes?" and were met with angry stares for ridiculing the franchises classic TV commercials. The manager approached and told them "no soup for you!" and then.....
urinated on their legs. He was relieved because he hadn't gone in a while due to...
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the fact that he had been trying to hold it for his girlfriend who was into....
filling water balloons with it and launching them at cars when they do something stupid when driving in order to show her displeasure with their behavior. Now she had to get some from...
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her brother from another mother. but he always charged her to....
let her collect it since it was very suitable for her purposes because it was full of...
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..vitamin C and was drinking the urine to support her immune system. She was'nt fond of the taste so she was mixing it with hot sauce.
Now she has diaheria from the hot sauce and is getting huge hemroids that are bursting everywhere and burning peoples skin. We must..................
get her to wear some protective clothing so when she explodes, it gets harmlessly directed to the ground, where only animals and short people were at risk of burns. Meanwhile,
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.....doctors were boarding helicopters filled with buckets of preparation H. They flew over the city dumping them on the people who were infected by this contagious epidemic. All were getting cured except men who like guy on guy action. Their bodies were immune to the ointment from always using it.
The only option was................
setting the city ablaze from a giant space station-magnifying glass in orbit around the earth...
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that was salvaged from the "Space Wars" movie. It was moved into place via space-monkeys who work very cheap since....
their currency is peanuts, and permits to fling poo at unsuspecting tourists...
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which is no fun since getting poo on you is like fu. However, if you put it in a bag and light it on fire.......
and set it on your doorstep, it's guaranteed to get a laugh, if you have poor short term memory...
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like i, uhhh...what were we talking about?
...you forget and stepped in the poo again. This time you were bare footed and the poo was trapped between your toes. You tried to clean it but it would not come off. Your only option was..............
amputation, but that seemed a little bit extreme, soinstead you tried finding some microbes that like eating poo, the only downside being that they like eating your foot better than they like eating the poo...
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....But if you smear bacon grease on your toes that may help. But be prepared for a phone call from......
.....Precious, she just got back from the Oscars and is tracking you down and heard you have bacon. She must own all the bacon in the world otherwise will starve and start eating humans. Hiding is not an option, you....................
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rummage through the pantry in your kitchen and find a 55 gallon drum of
creamed corn, and pour it...
..into the tub and take a creamed corn bath. But when you got out, you realized the error of your ways since you discovered.....
...in a spray gun. You spray your neighborhood with the corn hoping it will through off the scent of the bacon. But Precious can smell bacon from thousands of miles away and is not fooled. She is at your door hungry and angry. You.................
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quickly shove the nozzle of your spray gun up her nose and spray, flooding the sinuses with creamed corn....