- ok so i need some serious input on this as my finger is on the send button to send a wedding cancelation email. me and my gf's relationship was normal, yes a couple of arguments here and there. no big deal. and now 3 weeks to wedding day ****. we argue about stupid **** but i feel mostly that she starts them, no i know what youre thinking "she wants out" but yet shes the one that wants to get married more so. we have been together 9 years and she always wanted marriage. is this how marriages are? because damn. to me a marriage is nothing more than a paper and a tax break, but im going through it because i thought it was time and we talked it over and well she was eccstatic. anyway. do brides to be act like b!tches right before weddings.04-07-10 09:39 PMLike 0
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dc, that's exactly the example I started to post. Holy cow, what a loaded question! It's like that question, "How do these jeans make my bu�� look." Wrong answers are painful.
If a woman is cool with the arrangements, that's cool for you.
But, in social circles, lack of marriage can be a stigma. Friends chat, gossip, etc. And many times friends are lost when marriages occur, because that now puts the unmarried woman in an 'Outsider' status, and a temptation very few women want around their man.
If a woman has that marriage dream, she usually begins to lose her admiration of her man if a marriage doesn't happen. That 'foot' is always out the door. There's an escape. It begins to erode her self respect and confidence. And to many women, that lack of security is devastating.
The more of their friends that marry. The worse that pressure will get.
Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com04-07-10 10:30 PMLike 0 - Everyone here knows I'm against marriage.
But aside from my personal feelings on marriage, if you have to send her an email to cancel it then there's an underlying problem. COMMUNICATION. The most important thing in any relationship. You two don't have it. You are not ready to be married.04-08-10 01:18 AMLike 0 - Of course woman are evil before the wedding. They are stressed out. They want everything for their special day to be perfect. That's a lot of stress. Don't worry! After the wedding, things return to normal because the stress of planning the perfect wedding is gone. Women are generally more emotional than men also which makes men think we're b*tchy. If you've been happy with her for 9 years, don't let the pre-wedding madness get to you. It will all work out in the end.04-08-10 07:16 AMLike 0
- Of course woman are evil before the wedding. They are stressed out. They want everything for their special day to be perfect. That's a lot of stress. Don't worry! After the wedding, things return to normal because the stress of planning the perfect wedding is gone. Women are generally more emotional than men also which makes men think we're b*tchy. If you've been happy with her for 9 years, don't let the pre-wedding madness get to you. It will all work out in the end.
let it be said, let it be done.
Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com04-08-10 07:41 AMLike 0 - Wholly Moses. Grab your sac and do it (break-up, call it off, whatever) face-to-face.
Does this remind anyone else of when Berger broke up with Carrie on a Post-it note on Secks and the City?04-08-10 07:56 AMLike 0 - 1. Be an adult and talk to her face to face. Like forever29 said, there is a serious communication problem here.
2. Why get married if marriage is nothing but a piece of paper to you? Your basically lying to you fianc� by getting married to her. She thinks your value marriage when you really don't.
Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com04-08-10 08:19 AMLike 0 - You're getting wigged out over arguments after 9 years together, because you think it's about getting married. Married or otherwise, if you want to spend the rest of your life together, things are going to happen. If my wife or I split each time we got p!ssed off cause the other one did something stupid, we'd be divorced about 1,000 times.
Sounds to me like you haven't asked why you guys are arguing about stuff. And if you can't, or she can't discuss it, there something bigger going on.
As for finger on the email, chop it off before you suffer a life time of "remember when you know who canceled his wedding by email".04-08-10 08:52 AMLike 0 - It's funny that you say this. I'm the only single girl left out of my group of friends from HS. None of them ever want anything to do with me anymore.04-08-10 12:23 PMLike 0
- I know 'brides to be' get really stressed out because they want everything to go their way...why not? if your going to fork over so much money over something as important as a wedding day (people who get married im sure prefer only doing it once and not a few)
A marriage is important to me because i like being committed to someone, i like the title as someones wife, have my dad walk me down the isle and give me away, and because i love god to be united as one with my best friend cheesed ball i know04-08-10 12:39 PMLike 0 -
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- Sex definelty goes down hill lol. Man i got married thinking yea sex when i want all day anytime NOOOOOO sir. Its like chics get complacent when they get married. I'm not speaking about all of you but this is a common occurence. Just my two cents. Dont Do it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!04-08-10 02:17 PMLike 0
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- In my case, we blended two families, my one, her 5. We had to spend 18 months building up to marriage, to get well past the 'new' of it and ensure that we would be on the same page in those things that are so detrimental to a second marriage. If we couldn't be as close and open as possible, it would be a no-go.
Since there were kids, it was necessary to recognize how they would be raised. It was also policy agreed upon that there were only 3 things that nullify the vows. 3 A's. Abuse, Addiction, Affairs. Anything else can be worked through. With their lives already having been disrupted, the usual escape excuses could be devastating to a child's future.
Our wedding was very modest, the kids all teamed to make it for them, too. I think we blew a whopping $500 total.
And my wife still says it was far greater than her first, wheRe a whole lot more was spent.
We celebrate 8 years on the 20th. Our kids, having come from failed first marriages, thank us still for giving them an example of how to overcome adversity. One daughter is married and has worked through difficulty and keeping it whole, another marries in June. Both of them have made sure that their Big Day is about their relationship than the party. And they start their marriages without a huge burden for them or anyone else.
Now, imagine the trauma had I just been a Shack Up Honey. What would the lesson and results have led to?
Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com04-08-10 02:29 PMLike 0 -
- well people, we were visiting her family when the blowup happened. i was tired so i said lets go home but she wanted to stay with her family and said she would ask her sister to take her home. whatever. so i came home. ate dinner, was so stressed out i called a highschool friend to go out. (male) so i went to his house and we were just chitchatting and hanging out then he got a call from this friend (female) who said that she knew me from HS so she came over and we were all hanging out and talking when another guy from our HS stopped by since he lives out of state so it was cool a group. just talking and having fun. well my GF kept on blowing my phone with calls and text but i did not answer. the messages went like where are you to. what the is wrong with you, to i can't believe youre doing this, to im locking the door, sleep outside. to when are you coming home. to a crying message why are you doing this can you please just come home blah blah.... so after 4am i decided to go home and we didnt talk but i figured that we were alright since i was home. well my friend posted how fun it was to hang out the female friend and the out of state friend.
well this morning all f-ing **** broke lose. questioning on who the female friend was, if i was cheating and so on. she had been snooping on my bb but im not afraid of what she might find because theres nothing to hide. anyway she got the pastor's phone number and said she was going to call him (the pastor whos maybe going to marry us...) well we have not spoken. shes at work. so thing dont look so good but all i got to say is: when i told her that i would marry her i told her, if you ever call it off im never asking you ever again. so lets see what happens.............04-08-10 02:41 PMLike 0
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