[reeneebob]

Don't get started on my irrational love of Shatner - I'm a huge original series Trekkie, even went to a convention (met Scotty).

If it's Captain isn't Kirk, to me it's not Trek.

Sent from mah brainzzzzz via Galaxy S III and Tapatalk 2

[Engire]

Don't get started on my irrational love of Shatner - I'm a huge original series Trekkie, even went to a convention (met Scotty).

If it's Captain isn't Kirk, to me it's not Trek.

Sent from mah brainzzzzz via Galaxy S III and Tapatalk 2

Jon Luc shall hear of this heresy. Strong letter to follow.

[qbnkelt]

Have y'all noticed how True Blood on HBO has become THE place to go for nekkidness????

[nappp]

Have y'all noticed how True Blood on HBO has become THE place to go for nekkidness????

no, but thanks for the tip. lol

[anon(3641385)]

Hey, I'm late to this party .....

Does 202 pages make this the largest ever thread on Crackberry????

[anon(3641385)]

RETIRED HUSBAND

After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Target.

Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves to browse.

Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Target:

Dear Mrs. Harris ,

Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behaviour and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Harris , are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras:

1. June 15: He took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in Housewares. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and costing the company money.

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on lay-by.

6.. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers they could come in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.

8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called.

9... September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were..

11... October 3: Darted around the Store suspiciously while loudly humming the ' Mission Impossible' theme.

12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.

13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

14. October 22: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed the fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!

15.. Took a box of condoms to the checkout clerk and asked where is the fitting room?

And last, but not least:

16. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, and then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.'

One of the clerks passed out.

The General Manager
Target Stores

[qbnkelt]

That was wicked funny!!!!!!

[pantlesspenguin]

Ladies and gentlemen, what you are viewing is a rare glimpse of a Midwestern Pantless Penguin in her natural habitat. The debris around her roost indicates she is a recent inhabitant. She seems to be sipping some sort of nectar, with ice that she must have chipped from a nearby ice cap using her beak. Astounding. Careful, now. We mustn't disturb her.

[amazinglygraceless]

Hey, I'm late to this party .....

Does 202 pages make this the largest ever thread on Crackberry????

Not by a long shot

[TheScionicMan]

A woman was sipping on a glass of wine, while sitting on the patio with her husband, and she says,
"I love you so much, I don't know how I could ever live without you."

Her husband asks, "Is that you talking, or the wine?"

She replies, "It's me... talking to the wine."..

[TheScionicMan]

hey, i'm late to this party ..... :d

ibt5000

:d

[h20work]

So usually when people say "I spent the day putting out fires", they don't mean actual fires. I spent the day putting out fires.

diesel fuel burns quite well when it's being sprayed at high pressure into a nice toasty engine room.

[h20work]

I'm drinking large quantities of alcoholic beverages then watching cartoons in an attempt to forget today.

If you're not wasted, they day is.....

[amazinglygraceless]

So usually when people say "I spent the day putting out fires", they don't mean actual fires.

Except for this guy

The Photo Scavenger Hunt is the gift that keeps giving

[pantlesspenguin]

I'm drinking large quantities of alcoholic beverages then watching cartoons in an attempt to forget today.

If you're not wasted, they day is.....

Cheers, brotha. Thank you for the work you do.

[amazinglygraceless]

So usually when people say "I spent the day putting out fires", they don't mean actual fires. I spent the day putting out fires.

diesel fuel burns quite well when it's being sprayed at high pressure into a nice toasty engine room.

Oh you have to explain

[pantlesspenguin]

The bad thing about getting new awesome glasses? I returned the most recent pair, right, so now I'm back wearing my old pair. This is my old prescription, and the non glare coating has gotten a bit smeary since this pair is rather old. After about 4 weeks in a spanking new pair of glasses, this is torture. I'm going to Arizona on Thursday, and I can only hope my new pair will be ready by then. The transition lenses will come in mighty handy there. Plus, you know, my current prescription will allow me to see correctly.

[h20work]

Cheers, brotha. Thank you for the work you do.

That's not my yob mang , I normally do "pimp my ride" stuff to boats. Today was kind of an exception.

captain guy I wanted to repeatedly punch in the head the other day, left a fuel line loose causing a fire on brand new $3m+ yacht. I smell a law suit in the air....

On the plus side, I will be on a new discovery channel tv show called "salvage wars". I'll be the guy saying "phuck" a lot wearing a soot stained vitruvian panda shirt

[amazinglygraceless]

I kid y'all not, this guy is named Ryan DIRTEATER

The bull - Lucky Strike

[Engire]

Saw this a few years ago and it's kinda cruel but it is funny.

[YT]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MYdF7xLlA0M[/YT]

[h20work]

I really don't care if these show up sideways...

[TheScionicMan]

So, watching the movie Armageddon, where Bruce Willis and company have to blow up an asteriod that is going to hit Earth. One of the shuttles crashes on the asteriod, in the middle of SPACE and there's fire burning in the wreckage? Really?

Don't even get me started on 2012 that was on earlier. They push the boundaries of everything...

[TheScionicMan]

I really don't care if these show up sideways...

That's a mess from any angle...

What was it Forrest Gump said? Stupid is as stupid does...

[pantlesspenguin]

I kid y'all not, this guy is named Ryan DIRTEATER

The bull - Lucky Strike

Click to view quoted image

Moo, b!tches. That's right, I said moo.

[h20work]

So, watching the movie Armageddon, where Bruce Willis and company have to blow up an asteriod that is going to hit Earth. One of the shuttles crashes on the asteriod, in the middle of SPACE and there's fire burning in the wreckage? Really?

Don't even get me started on 2012 that was on earlier. They push the boundaries of everything...

Just wait until they release the digitally remastered version, it will have extra x-wings and the big "ring" from the explosion