1. anon(3732391)'s Avatar

    Muppets found dead after Sesame Street serves GMOs at cast cafeteria




    Officials are calling it the worst massacre since Jonestown. Big Bird, Kermit the Frog and little Miss Piggy, along with the rest of the Sesame Street crew, were found dead this morning at the cast cafeteria. Police investigators claim that the Swedish Chef, who is now in custody, deliberately poisoned the Sesame Street crew by serving them genetically modified organisms (GMOs).

    The scene at the cast cafeteria resembles a horror scene straight out of a Stephen King novel. The bodies of dead muppets littered the lunch room floor. Officials concluded that Miss Piggy died of suffocation after discovering a half-eaten genetically modified apple in her mouth, as well as severe throat swelling and organ damage.

    Big Bird appears to have died of a massive heart attack. His left wing was found clutched over his chest next to a spattered glass of milk at the scene. The autopsy report revealed that hormones from the genetically modified milk caused his breasts to swell, thereby leading to a massive heart attack. The poor bird collapsed under his own weight.


    Kermit the Frog appears to have choked to death after consuming a genetically modified insect. Genes added to the bug inadvertently caused its wings to expand to twice their normal size. Consequently, Kermit the Frog couldn�t swallow the beast as it frantically tried to escape from his wind pipe.

    One of the muppets, the Cookie Monster, was found to have been killed by lung hemorrhaging after inhaling fumes from a Roundup-contaminated cookie.

    The only muppet who escaped the debacle alive was a One Time Sock Named Grover. Apparently, the Rag-a-Nuffin had built up an immunity to genetically modified food after talking garbage for so many years.on an obscure website.
    TGIS, kbz1960 and jaydee5799 like this.
    05-12-16 12:42 PM
  2. anon(3732391)'s Avatar
    still need groceries. And need to mail my broken G4 back to Ft. Worth
    I knew it! I said she'd drop it within a week!!
    Carjackd and kbz1960 like this.
    05-12-16 12:44 PM
  3. anon(3732391)'s Avatar
    what's up for the weekend?
    oh yeah....it's not necessarily the weekend for you guys yet!


    Whadaya mean???? Not Necessarily??????
    Carjackd and kbz1960 like this.
    05-12-16 12:45 PM
  4. grover5's Avatar
    Fondly looking back.... I remember:

    The Ozzie and Harriet (Nelson) Show. They were both alcoholics in real life. Rickie and David were on drugs .
    Leave It To Beaver. Hugh Beaumont (Dad) was Gay.
    The HoneyMooners ..Every week, Live on national Television, Ralph got to make a fist, look at Alice and say "To The Moon, Alice!" Telling the American People that it was OK to beat your wife if she got out of line.

    Indians were still the bad guys,
    Christmas and Easter were sacred holidays.
    You Pledged "allegiance" to a flag
    We learned how to hide under our desks at school, in case someone dropped a bomb in the area... But we were living "The American Dream"
    Self Cleaning ovens (meaning you cleaned it yourself)
    Your very own washer and dryer....

    But the best part of all was ONE phone in every house the you had to "dial" and if needed anything (information, the time, whatever) you had to actually figure it out yourself.

    Next week join me and my Rag-a-Nuffin friend for a fond look back at the 60's.


    Now where's my Martini???
    I'm sorry sir. We seem to be all out. Please try next door.
    05-12-16 01:14 PM
  5. anon(3732391)'s Avatar
    I'm sorry sir. We seem to be all out. Please try next door.
    I took your advice and went to the next door but it was still my place.
    Carjackd and kbz1960 like this.
    05-12-16 01:19 PM
  6. anon(3732391)'s Avatar
    Originally Posted by jaydee5799
    i am really tired tonight
    I'm still Jack'd
    That's YOUR opinion!!
    Carjackd and kbz1960 like this.
    05-12-16 01:26 PM
  7. anon(3732391)'s Avatar
    Why are you thinking we are thinking ?

    What??? You can't hear the smoke alarms?????
    Carjackd and kbz1960 like this.
    05-12-16 01:29 PM
  8. anon(3732391)'s Avatar
    Do wrong Beers exist?
    Was it made by humans????? (That's actually an answer.)
    Carjackd and kbz1960 like this.
    05-12-16 01:32 PM
  9. anon(3732391)'s Avatar
    There is a sunny side around here?
    Yes! Yes there is!
    You could see it if only you could lift off that fog around your head!
    Carjackd and kbz1960 like this.
    05-12-16 01:35 PM
  10. anon(3732391)'s Avatar
    Z is a zooper!
    Zoppers are cute fuzzy little bots

    Z has No fuzz and is too tall to be a bot.
    He's kinda cute, though, so he MAY be related!!
    Carjackd and kbz1960 like this.
    05-12-16 01:38 PM
  11. anon(3732391)'s Avatar
    Originally Posted by Rare BlackBerry Fan
    I got my new phone
    What did you get slacker??

    You, of all people, should know he didn't get a Slacker.
    The Slacker phone was taken out of production because after pre-marketing try-outs,
    they found that the slackers that the Slacker Phone targeted would have had to stop slacking to use the phone.
    Carjackd and kbz1960 like this.
    05-12-16 01:43 PM
  12. anon(3732391)'s Avatar
    Originally Posted by Lostboy5151
    NO! And.... NO!
    Not necessarily!!


    Can you round it to the nearest no?


    You did it! You took my innocent post and found a completely different reply!
    And, I get it!!!

    I guess I'm gonna have to step up my abuse to get you to the next level.
    This is exciting. Who could ever imagine that a Doofus could evolve???

    But, hell, it was probably just an accident and he doesn't even know what he meant!
    Carjackd and kbz1960 like this.
    05-12-16 01:56 PM
  13. TGIS's Avatar
    oh yeah....it's not necessarily the weekend for you guys yet!
    Enjoying the warmth on Friday
    Carjackd and kbz1960 like this.
    05-12-16 01:57 PM
  14. Carjackd's Avatar
    OMG... Another Random Unidentified Pantless Post!


    I didn't even see THAT one comin'!!
    I just watched it going
    anon(3732391) and kbz1960 like this.
    05-12-16 01:57 PM
  15. TGIS's Avatar
    Then 40's on Sunday
    Carjackd and kbz1960 like this.
    05-12-16 01:57 PM
  16. Carjackd's Avatar
    Oh boy! Goody-goody! I'm getting groomed. I hope Doofus walks me past the house with that cute little poodle.
    http://bestanimations.com/Cartoons/F...ie-01-june.gif
    With me looking all cool and sharp...... they'll think Doofus is my hired Dog-Walker.
    Otherwise,If they knew he was my master, they'd know we live in back by the dumpster.
    At least the food is good
    anon(3732391) and kbz1960 like this.
    05-12-16 01:58 PM
  17. TGIS's Avatar
    Muppets found dead after Sesame Street serves GMOs at cast cafeteria

    http://www.newsparody.com/wp-content...eadKermit1.png http://www.newsparody.com/wp-content...1258038413.jpg


    Officials are calling it the worst massacre since Jonestown. Big Bird, Kermit the Frog and little Miss Piggy, along with the rest of the Sesame Street crew, were found dead this morning at the cast cafeteria. Police investigators claim that the Swedish Chef, who is now in custody, deliberately poisoned the Sesame Street crew by serving them genetically modified organisms (GMOs).

    The scene at the cast cafeteria resembles a horror scene straight out of a Stephen King novel. The bodies of dead muppets littered the lunch room floor. Officials concluded that Miss Piggy died of suffocation after discovering a half-eaten genetically modified apple in her mouth, as well as severe throat swelling and organ damage.

    Big Bird appears to have died of a massive heart attack. His left wing was found clutched over his chest next to a spattered glass of milk at the scene. The autopsy report revealed that hormones from the genetically modified milk caused his breasts to swell, thereby leading to a massive heart attack. The poor bird collapsed under his own weight.


    Kermit the Frog appears to have choked to death after consuming a genetically modified insect. Genes added to the bug inadvertently caused its wings to expand to twice their normal size. Consequently, Kermit the Frog couldn�t swallow the beast as it frantically tried to escape from his wind pipe.

    One of the muppets, the Cookie Monster, was found to have been killed by lung hemorrhaging after inhaling fumes from a Roundup-contaminated cookie.

    The only muppet who escaped the debacle alive was a One Time Sock Named Grover. Apparently, the Rag-a-Nuffin had built up an immunity to genetically modified food after talking garbage for so many years.on an obscure website.
    Grover is one lucky Rag-a-nuffin!
    05-12-16 01:58 PM
  18. Carjackd's Avatar
    Do you even know WHAT a peep is?
    Have you actually ever even SEEN a peep... let alone, a GOOD peep????


    I think not!!!
    You're my peeps and Aliens
    anon(3732391) and kbz1960 like this.
    05-12-16 01:58 PM
  19. Carjackd's Avatar
    Grover is one lucky Rag-a-nuffin!
    I'd say
    anon(3732391) and kbz1960 like this.
    05-12-16 01:59 PM
  20. anon(3732391)'s Avatar
    Originally Posted by Lostboy5151
    Go ahead JayDee. JUST SAY IT!! Scream it out and it shall set you free!!!!

    " I AM NOT ORGANIZED"

    Go on! Say it!
    Stop torturing yourself!


    Just in case you need to borrow some.. here is some dumb Dee dumb Dee dumb to get you by

    Thanks Jackd! I owe you!!
    Carjackd and kbz1960 like this.
    05-12-16 01:59 PM
  21. TGIS's Avatar
    I'm sorry sir. We seem to be all out. Please try next door.
    That's what they said
    05-12-16 01:59 PM
  22. TGIS's Avatar
    Originally Posted by Rare BlackBerry Fan http://forums.crackberry.com/images/...post-right.png
    I got my new phone



    You, of all people, should know he didn't get a Slacker.
    The Slacker phone was taken out of production because after pre-marketing try-outs,
    they found that the slackers that the Slacker Phone targeted would have had to stop slacking to use the phone.
    I think G2hockey bought one
    05-12-16 02:00 PM
  23. Carjackd's Avatar
    Fondly looking back.... I remember:

    The Ozzie and Harriet (Nelson) Show. They were both alcoholics in real life. Rickie and David were on drugs .
    Leave It To Beaver. Hugh Beaumont (Dad) was Gay.
    The HoneyMooners ..Every week, Live on national Television, Ralph got to make a fist, look at Alice and say "To The Moon, Alice!" Telling the American People that it was OK to beat your wife if she got out of line.

    Indians were still the bad guys,
    Christmas and Easter were sacred holidays.
    You Pledged "allegiance" to a flag
    We learned how to hide under our desks at school, in case someone dropped a bomb in the area... But we were living "The American Dream"
    Self Cleaning ovens (meaning you cleaned it yourself)
    Your very own washer and dryer....

    But the best part of all was ONE phone in every house the you had to "dial" and if needed anything (information, the time, whatever) you had to actually figure it out yourself.

    Next week join me and my Rag-a-Nuffin friend for a fond look back at the 60's.


    Now where's my Martini???
    Shak'n or stirred?
    anon(3732391) and kbz1960 like this.
    05-12-16 02:00 PM
  24. TGIS's Avatar
    He's quite the slacker
    05-12-16 02:00 PM
  25. Carjackd's Avatar
    remind me wut?
    I dunno that was so this morning
    anon(3732391) and kbz1960 like this.
    05-12-16 02:00 PM
618,099 ... 2031120312203132031420315 ...

Similar Threads

  1. Is it possible to personalize the Motion?
    By Hydrantboy in forum BlackBerry Motion
    Replies: 14
    Last Post: 04-30-19, 07:28 AM
  2. Replies: 2
    Last Post: 04-18-19, 07:10 AM
  3. Replies: 1
    Last Post: 04-17-19, 05:49 PM
  4. KEY2 and KEY2 LE screen protectors the same?
    By tahna_los in forum BlackBerry KEY2
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 04-17-19, 05:47 PM
  5. New Google Hangouts Chat in the Hub?
    By saescott in forum BlackBerry HUB+ Suite
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 04-17-19, 09:31 AM

Tags for this Thread

LINK TO POST COPIED TO CLIPBOARD