1. pantlesspenguin's Avatar
    Where's Q? I just know she must have some dirty jokes...
    h20work, kbz1960, louzer and 8 others like this.
    07-26-12 12:48 PM
  2. Sith_Apprentice's Avatar
    A koala walks into a house of ill repute and says I want the best hooker and a room.

    The establishment directs the koala to room 23 where the most beautiful hooker is waiting.

    The koala commences to do his thing, finishes and is headed for the door.

    The hooker says, hey wait you need to pay me.

    The koala says I'm a koala I'm leaving.

    The hooker says you don't understand. You need to pay me for my services.

    The koala says I'm a koala I'm leaving.

    Getting frustrated the hooker finds a dictionary and shows the koala. Hooker, person who does sexual favors for pay. See, you need to pay me.

    The koala grabs the dictionary and shows the hooker. Koala, eats bushes, shoots and leaves.
    hahahaha nicely done
    Engire, wu-wei, Lendo and 2 others like this.
    07-26-12 12:54 PM
  3. bungaboy's Avatar
    Since we've already discussed both of these topics, I think its only fitting...

    Click to view quoted image
    Ha ha ha. That is the first US Beer I ever drank. Back when I was in my late teens.

    And no I didn't work every time. I drank it not the women. L0L
    07-26-12 12:58 PM
  4. h20work's Avatar
    Who was the greatest prostitute in history?

    Ms Pacman, for 25 cents she would swallow balls until she died.
    07-26-12 12:59 PM
  5. drjay868's Avatar
    Trying to figure out what I want to do this weekend and I'm really torn between going boating or mudding...

    Might as well do both!

    Engire, wu-wei, middbrew and 3 others like this.
    07-26-12 01:07 PM
  6. h20work's Avatar
    So this weak little accountant gets sent to prison for fraud. The guards take him to his cell where he finds a huge beast of guy who will be his cell mate. As soon as the guard leaves, the big guy says "you know what's going to happen right?" The accountant trembles and says "I think so...". The big guy says "ok, I'm going to give you a choice, do you want to be the husband or the wife?" The accountant thinks to himself for a minute trying to figure out which is better. He says "ok, I guess I want to be the husband". Big guy says "great! Now come over here and suck your wife's d*#k!"
    Last edited by h20work; 07-26-12 at 01:19 PM.
    07-26-12 01:13 PM
  7. amazinglygraceless's Avatar
    So this weak little accountant gets sent to prison for fraud.
    I already don't like this joke
    louzer, bungaboy, Engire and 6 others like this.
    07-26-12 02:17 PM
  8. TheScionicMan's Avatar
    A man goes to his mental competency hearing wearing nothing but plastic food wrap.
    The judge takes one look at him and says: "I can clearly see you're nuts"
    07-26-12 02:49 PM
  9. amazinglygraceless's Avatar
    A man kisses his wife and say "well hon, I'm off to the doctor"

    Two hours later he returns home decked out in a $1,000 dollar suit.
    His wife takes one look at him and says "What gives' I thought you went
    to see the doctor"

    He says "I did and since he said I was IM-PO-TENT, I figured I'd dress up"
    07-26-12 04:17 PM
  10. pantlesspenguin's Avatar
    A man goes to his mental competency hearing wearing nothing but plastic food wrap.
    The judge takes one look at him and says: "I can clearly see you're nuts"
    Speaking of....

    A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel attached to the crotch of his pants. Of course he gets quite a few stares as he walks up to the bar and takes a seat. Finally, a fellow taps him on the shoulder and says "Excuse me. I notice you have a steering wheel attached to your crotch....."

    "Argh!" the pirate interrupts "It's driving me nuts!"
    07-26-12 04:24 PM
  11. TheScionicMan's Avatar
    A man goes to his mental competency hearing wearing nothing but plastic food wrap.
    The judge takes one look at him and says: "I can clearly see you're nuts"
    The attorney that used to sit across the hall from me always had a big glass jar of almonds on his desk and I would think of this joke every time i saw it.
    07-26-12 04:26 PM
  12. bungaboy's Avatar
    There was adouble-decker bus driver in London who have a very strong Cockney accent.

    One day as he pulled up to a bus stop he noticed a poor soul standing in que waiting for the bus.

    The poor soul was a man with 3 eyes, no arms and only one leg.

    When it comes time for the poor soul to board the bus he anxiously looks up at the bus driver.

    The bus driver in his very strong Cockney accent looks at the poor soul and says.

    "Aye, aye aye. You look 'armless enough. 'Op on.



    (Translation if you didn't get the Cockney accent just right = Eye, eye, eye. You look harmless enough. Hop on.)
    Engire, wu-wei, middbrew and 4 others like this.
    07-26-12 05:11 PM
  13. bungaboy's Avatar
    CrackBerry Bird Dogs?

    07-26-12 06:39 PM
  14. amazinglygraceless's Avatar
    CrackBerry Bird Dogs?

    Click to view quoted image
    THAT is just disturbing
    h20work, Engire, wu-wei and 6 others like this.
    07-26-12 06:42 PM
  15. bungaboy's Avatar
    THAT is just disturbing
    Fits in nicely, eh? rofl
    Engire, wu-wei, middbrew and 4 others like this.
    07-26-12 06:53 PM
  16. h20work's Avatar
    Haven't received any "likes" for 5000 seconds.

    Must... Attempt... Random... Act... Of... Humor....
    louzer, Engire, wu-wei and 5 others like this.
    07-26-12 07:06 PM
  17. h20work's Avatar
    Not exactly fitting with stupid joke day, but I found a way to ammuse myself on my commute. Everytime another driver looks at me, I wave excitedly and say hi. I get a lot of wtf looks....
    drjay868, bungaboy, louzer and 9 others like this.
    07-26-12 07:08 PM
  18. drjay868's Avatar
    Just broke your 5000 second streak!
    louzer, Engire, wu-wei and 6 others like this.
    07-26-12 07:24 PM
  19. h20work's Avatar
    chinese restaurant I went to in port of spain, trinidad

    07-26-12 07:40 PM
  20. louzer's Avatar
    5000 reasons this thread is awesome:

    5000: No dress code.
    4999: It's much more friendly than News or General Discussion.
    4998: The drinks are cheap.
    4997: The jokes are funny.
    4996: Different devices don't mean a continental divide.
    4995: Everyone likes what everyone else says.
    4994: Even after visits by moderators, no one's been banned.
    4993: It's a long way until BB10 comes out.
    4992: It keeps me from lurking eBay and impulse shopping for more gadgets.
    4991: We've turned a potentially troll-like thread into something completely different.

    ...
    07-26-12 07:55 PM
  21. h20work's Avatar
    I'm impariently waiting for Q to come in and drop a zinger.
    louzer, Engire, wu-wei and 5 others like this.
    07-26-12 07:57 PM
  22. amazinglygraceless's Avatar
    5000 reasons this thread is awesome: Continued....

    4990. Pants are optional
    4989. Mother of all thread-jacks
    4988. We have wine, beer, Scotch and Cheetohs
    4987. Thread is virtually troll proof
    4986. We have Q and PantlessPenguin. "Nuff said
    4985. The more you drink, the more this makes sense. Sober this thing is a b!tch to follow
    Last edited by amazinglygraceless; 07-26-12 at 08:40 PM.
    h20work, Engire, bungaboy and 12 others like this.
    07-26-12 08:08 PM
  23. h20work's Avatar
    4984 weight loss/calorie burning advice
    4983 d*ck jokes
    4982 cat jokes


    Ag had to count backasswords....
    Last edited by h20work; 07-26-12 at 08:19 PM.
    07-26-12 08:13 PM
  24. bungaboy's Avatar
    5000 reasons this thread is awesome: Continued....

    4990. Pants are optional
    4989. Mother of all thread-jacks
    4988. We have wine, beer, Scotch and Cheetohs
    4997. Thread is virtually troll proof
    4996. We have Q and PantlessPenguin. "Nuff said
    4995. The more you drink, the more this makes sense. Sober this thing is a b!tch to follow
    4984 weight loss/calorie burning advice
    4983 d*ck jokes
    4982 cat jokes


    Ag had to count backasswords....

    4981 You don't get flamed for not taking your shoes off to count.
    07-26-12 08:24 PM
  25. amazinglygraceless's Avatar
    4984 weight loss/calorie burning advice
    4983 d*ck jokes
    4982 cat jokes


    Ag had to count backasswords....
    4981 You don't get flamed for not taking your shoes off to count.
    You guys expect an Accountant to be able to actually count? The nerve
    h20work, bungaboy, louzer and 10 others like this.
    07-26-12 08:41 PM
562,544 ... 3435363738 ...

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