[louzer]

I really need to stop eating/drinking when browsing the forums.

Mornin' y'all! I have an interview today. I'd ask you to wish me luck but I'm not sure I want the position. I've applied like 4 other times and each time they pick someone vastly less qualified than me. I don't want to work with people who don't want to work with me. I don't know why I'm doing this.

Good luck anyway. If they offer the position to you, then the decision is yours which is always the better position to be in.

[middbrew]

aren't the stock markets cranky today!

The sky is falling!

Sell Sell Sell

[pantlesspenguin]

Well definitely good luck! No matter what you decide. And their choosing of others could be a variety of factors and may not (even though the vast majority of the decision should be) based on qualifications.

Yeah, I've never been a good interviewer or test taker. So I choke in interviews. If the position was for a full-time interview questioner answerer then heck no I'd absolutely be the wrong candidate. But the position is for a training specialist. For this company alone, I've mentored, assisted with on-the-job training, created a procedure manual for part of a department, and assisted in creating a policies and guidelines manual for management. Outside this company, I've taught in a classroom setting and I have a friggin' Master's in Organizational Development so I've given countless presentations.

The last time I applied for this position, I wasn't put through to the second round of interviews, but this lady that had a GED, absolutely no presentation experience, and horrible grammar was put through to the second round, which was giving a presentation to the training team. And she asked me for advice. She had never used powerpoint before and thought that coming up with titles for each slide was "challenging." Yeah...

[middbrew]

Aren't the stock markets cranky today!

The sky is fall! But it always goes back up.

Buy Buy Buy

[middbrew]

Yeah, I've never been a good interviewer or test taker. So I choke in interviews. If the position was for a full-time interview questioner answerer then heck no I'd absolutely be the wrong candidate. But the position is for a training specialist. For this company alone, I've mentored, assisted with on-the-job training, created a procedure manual for part of a department, and assisted in creating a policies and guidelines manual for management. Outside this company, I've taught in a classroom setting and I have a friggin' Master's in Organizational Development so I've given countless presentations.

The last time I applied for this position, I wasn't put through to the second round of interviews, but this lady that had a GED, absolutely no presentation experience, and horrible grammar was put through to the second round, which was giving a presentation to the training team. And she asked me for advice. She had never used powerpoint before and thought that coming up with titles for each slide was "challenging." Yeah...

Not too fair. I do understand your frustration and second guessing whether you want the job in the first place.

[Sith_Apprentice]

Yeah, I've never been a good interviewer or test taker. So I choke in interviews. If the position was for a full-time interview questioner answerer then heck no I'd absolutely be the wrong candidate. But the position is for a training specialist. For this company alone, I've mentored, assisted with on-the-job training, created a procedure manual for part of a department, and assisted in creating a policies and guidelines manual for management. Outside this company, I've taught in a classroom setting and I have a friggin' Master's in Organizational Development so I've given countless presentations.

The last time I applied for this position, I wasn't put through to the second round of interviews, but this lady that had a GED, absolutely no presentation experience, and horrible grammar was put through to the second round, which was giving a presentation to the training team. And she asked me for advice. She had never used powerpoint before and thought that coming up with titles for each slide was "challenging." Yeah...

People put WAY too much stress on themselves with interviews. This is a conversation with someone about something you know more about than anyone else alive. This is a conversation about YOU. The more confident you are, the more you engage in eye contact, the more you speak fluently and without hesitate the better off you will be. Interviewers can forgive lack of knowledge in at least part of the areas, even highly technical interviews, if you admit that you are working on that, and tell/show them you are not uncomfortable asking for help when its needed.

[TheScionicMan]

Yeah, I've never been a good interviewer or test taker. So I choke in interviews. If the position was for a full-time interview questioner answerer then heck no I'd absolutely be the wrong candidate. But the position is for a training specialist. For this company alone, I've mentored, assisted with on-the-job training, created a procedure manual for part of a department, and assisted in creating a policies and guidelines manual for management. Outside this company, I've taught in a classroom setting and I have a friggin' Master's in Organizational Development so I've given countless presentations.

The last time I applied for this position, I wasn't put through to the second round of interviews, but this lady that had a GED, absolutely no presentation experience, and horrible grammar was put through to the second round, which was giving a presentation to the training team. And she asked me for advice. She had never used powerpoint before and thought that coming up with titles for each slide was "challenging." Yeah...

Sometimes being competent and well-educated can be a detriment. I've seen people come up with all kinds of reasons for making hiring choices. A common one is that you're "over-qualified" which makes people worry that you might find another job since you are obviously too smart for this one. So it's easier to hire an underqualified person that will cling to the position and then the supervisor doesn't have to go through the hiring process again. Salary requests are also a big factor. Unless it is a job with a set pay, they may be hiring cheaper than what you're worth.

If you don't get it this time, I'd assume that the cosmos is keeping you from making a big mistake...

[drjay868]

Aren't the stock markets cranky today!

Hmmmm.... I wonder what could have caused this. What could have possibly happened that investors and business aren't high on the future of the economy?

[drjay868]

I really need to stop eating/drinking when browsing the forums.

Mornin' y'all! I have an interview today. I'd ask you to wish me luck but I'm not sure I want the position. I've applied like 4 other times and each time they pick someone vastly less qualified than me. I don't want to work with people who don't want to work with me. I don't know why I'm doing this.

Whether you want the position or not, its good to do the interview. You may find something new about the position (you may or may not like) and they will hopefully find something new about you (that they hopefully like). And, as was said, if they offer it to you, you don't have to take it.

Good luck tho!

[Sith_Apprentice]

Hmmmm.... I wonder what could have caused this. What could have possibly happened that investors and business aren't high on the future of the economy?

lol hmm Romney supporter?

[pkcable]

Point of clarification. Do I have to be pantless to participate in this thread? I can do that just so ya know. I'm at work but they'll deal with it.


Sent from my 4s using TapaTalk

You don't HAVE to be but it sure helps!

[pkcable]

[drjay868]

lol hmm Romney supporter?

LOL... not my first choice (or second or third), but in this election, definitely better than the other option, IMO. OK, I'm done with politics.

BTW, the real answer is Greece happened.

[bungaboy]

The sky is falling!

Sell Sell Sell

Wait . . . wait . . . not yet . . . hang in there . . . . NOW! BUY BUY BUY!

[bungaboy]

Hmmmm.... I wonder what could have caused this. What could have possibly happened that investors and business aren't high on the future of the economy?

No. More like . . . . .

[phoreoneone]

Here is a little light reading before work or lunch.

Alright...I don't care if you guys believe me ... it's real. This is the the most embarassing thing that I've ever experienced... it was a horrible night for me.. and I'm sharing it with you guys because I don't want any of my misc brahs to have to go through this.. especially since it all could have been EASILY prevented. I have added MS paint images so that you have a better idea as to what happened. It's very long, but I'll do my best to recount all of the important details. no ****ing cliffs..... read it to save yourself from something like this...

Anyway...
If you've been following my social anxiety thread you would have learned that I got an asian girls number during my last update (the encounter wasn't recorded unfortunetely because my Camera froze). But anyway, it's been over a week and I was feeling like taking a break from exam studying, and I figured that if I didn't call her before exams were done then I wouldn't get a chance to see her until after the break (which would be too long perhaps). So I called her up and asked her if she wanted to take a break from studying and meet me for coffee. Well she said yes, and we met at a campus cafe. We had some small talk, and it went well overall. After that she said "hey my roomate is making some chinese food for dinner because her boyfriend is over, would you like to come by and try some? she usually makes way more than needed". Now at that point I felt like I had to take a sh!t, but there was no way I could turn down this opportunity; it seemed like she was into me and this would be a great opportunity to get to know each other further. So I decided to try and hold my crap as long as possible (I don't crap in public toilets) and accept her invitation.

Well we went back to her place, had some food (very good btw)... and ****... I had to take take a sh!t really badly... and I also had to take a really badly (I had been holding that too since I didn't bring my pee bottles with me to the date)... I really didn't want to use her washroom because I didn't want stink the place up... but it became so unbearable to the point where I could feel the turd popping out of my rectum.. to make matters worse I was actually starting to get an (I'm not sure why.. but that's what happened). So I rushed to the washroom... and thus begins the worst possible scenario imagineable.

I pull down my pants step up to the toilet and I am then faced with an ominous predicament; I have to extremely badly take BOTH a pee AND a POO.... AND I have an .... what the **** do I do? Which do I do first??

So I bend over and try to push my erected down a bit to pee into the can... but as I relax my pelvic floor muscles to release the urine.. I feel my turd start to come out at the same time!
So then I'm like "fuk this... I'll just try and hold the pee and let the poo come out"... so I sit on the can... grasp my hard to try and "block" it... and I then tried to let the crap come out....that didn't work so well...

As I relaxed my anal sphincters... my pelvic floor muscles relaxed as well and started flying all over the floor... I started panicking at this point... so I desperately held my crap again, while I attempted to shove/bend my erect into the toilet. Once it was in... I tried take the and crap at the same time, but my was too far out and this massive turd started flying out missing the bowl, landing partially on the back rim and partially on the floor.

I then closed everything off again (you can't imagine the pain of repeatedly blocking yourself from peeing and pooing when you have go so badly)... wtf was I supposed to do? I either pee on her floor or poo on her floor....then out of sheer desperation and instinct an idea popped into my head:

I ran into her bathtub and let myself go there... I figured that at least this way I could rinse it all down instead of getting sh!t on her floor....

At that point things get even worse...
The turd wouldn't ****ing dissolve... and the damn woman was asking me wtf I'm doing showering in her washroom....
I then answer "yea lol... I'm showering... is that ok?"...
she says: what the ? why?? you don't think we're having sex do you???
At this point I can't even think straight and I jokingly (retardedly) say: yes we are lol
she then gets mad and says: wtf? is this some kind of joke... get out of there!!
I say: no please don't come in... I'm not done yet...
At this point the hot water I was using to try and dissolve my sh!t was releasing sh!t smelling vapours all over the room.. and it was pretty rancid... the girl could smell it and she said: "why the does it smell so ****ing bad? What the are you doing in there???"

I say: please don't come in... trust me.. you'll regret it...

she says: **** this... get out now or I'm unlocking the door..

I beg her not too... but she loses her patience and then opens the door. She stops dead in her tracks. There before her was me standing with a pseudo-erect , left over fecal residue on my ,large semi dissolved turds in her bathtub, turds on the floor beside her toilet, and pee all over the floor in front of the can... I was so ****ing embarassed... I started shivering... she looks at me while covering her mouth and nose and whispers... "wtf did you do???"...she was starting to cry... I hesitate for a bit and I try to explain myself "I tried my best ... I... I'm sorry"... She then flips out and tells me to clean up the mess or she's calling the cops. I agree to do it.

She leaves, and I grap some toilet paper... pick up the turds from the floor and bathtub, toss them in the can, and then I proceed to clean off the floor and bathtub with soap, water and alot of tissues. I tossed most of the tissues into her toilet bowl (the garbage was full eventually). I then took some perfume from the counter and tossed into the bathtub to get rid of odour. After I was done I cleaned my off and flushed the toilet. To my utmost dismay, my massive fecal matter bulk and the large amount of TP unded up clogging the toilet and it overflowed and started spilling crap all over the floor... I'm literally crying at that point... I look for the plunger but I couldn't find it so I put my pants on and rushed out to ask her if she had a plunger so I could fix the toilet...I see her with her roommate and her roommates bf... she's crying... as soon as she sees me she tells me to gtfo right now... I try to explain that the toilet is clogged... but she doesn't let me ... she says she feels threatened and she wants me out now... she graps a knife from the drawer and tells me to leave... I leave. about a minute later I hear this loud scream coming from her dorm room (I assumed she went back to the washroom to see it covered in poo water). At that point I sprinted away as fast as possible, while swearing at myself and crying tears of frustration and embarrasment.

All of this could have ****ing been prevented if I had just brought my goddamn pee bottles!!! WTF?!?! The FIRST girl that shows interest in me.. I have to go and **** in her bathtub???? This is ****ing ******** (yes mad).

to all you people saying "peeing in bottles is stupid/gross"... well **** that... not only is it more convenient and cleaner, but it also prevents epic disaters like this one....

This is what WOULD have happened if I had my trustee pee bottle... I would have on sat on the can and then simultaneosly peed into the bottle and pooed into the toilet. No disaster... no mess.... and none of this would have happened. anyway... should I let things cool off for a bit and call her back? maybe to apologize/explain myself? or should i just hope I never run into her again?

Source (NSFW)

[pantlesspenguin]

People put WAY too much stress on themselves with interviews. This is a conversation with someone about something you know more about than anyone else alive. This is a conversation about YOU. The more confident you are, the more you engage in eye contact, the more you speak fluently and without hesitate the better off you will be. Interviewers can forgive lack of knowledge in at least part of the areas, even highly technical interviews, if you admit that you are working on that, and tell/show them you are not uncomfortable asking for help when its needed.

The problem is that these are situational/behavioral interviews, and not intervews about my qualifications. They spend an hour asking me questions like "Tell us of a time when you displayed diplomacy and tact in a work setting" and then at the end they ask if there's anything else they should know and then I struggle to remember all the stuff that I need to say that's relevant to the job. When it comes to talking about my qualifications and accomplishments, and even questions about my own strengths and weaknesses I'm fine with that. It's all the other stuff that gets in the way.

[phoreoneone]

now this seems appropriate

[phoreoneone]

one of my favourite TV shows

[Sith_Apprentice]

The problem is that these are situational/behavioral interviews, and not intervews about my qualifications. They spend an hour asking me questions like "Tell us of a time when you displayed diplomacy and tact in a work setting" and then at the end they ask if there's anything else they should know and then I struggle to remember all the stuff that I need to say that's relevant to the job. When it comes to talking about my qualifications and accomplishments, and even questions about my own strengths and weaknesses I'm fine with that. It's all the other stuff that gets in the way.

You are speaking from past experience in these behavioral questions. Again something you know better than anyone. I just went through a very difficult interview (2+ hours, 3 seconds, panel interview, 10 minutes to answer each question orally) and it was quite similar. You are selling yourself in these things, regardless of other qualifications. They wouldnt bring you in if you were not qualified. Talk about yourself, and things you have done

[TheScionicMan]

I always say the worst part about work is finding it.

[pantlesspenguin]

You are speaking from past experience in these behavioral questions. Again something you know better than anyone. I just went through a very difficult interview (2+ hours, 3 seconds, panel interview, 10 minutes to answer each question orally) and it was quite similar. You are selling yourself in these things, regardless of other qualifications. They wouldnt bring you in if you were not qualified. Talk about yourself, and things you have done

The problem is that the questions don't have to do with things I've done. They're really odd. Also, I think my chances are hurt because I never know what to say when asked about disagreements with superiors. I've been EXTREMELY lucky thus far having the most amazing bosses. The only time there was a disagreement was when I was working part time in grad school, and I ended up leaving because it was a crappy job and their demands were unreasonable. My interviewers probably don't want to hear that lol. Something I'm doing differently this time, though, I'm taking down a copy of an old training plan I created in grad school.

[TheScionicMan]

So what did all y'all eat for lunch or plan to eat for lunch? I need a new idea...

[OniBerry]

The sky is falling!

Sell Sell Sell

Oh thanks for reminding me....Skyfall tonight!!! Almost forgot....haha

[qbnkelt]

So what happens when we actually get to 50K ?

You send us all beer and pizza.