1. thurask's Avatar
    %COMPANY% Rumored to Buy Out BlackBerry Ltd.

    (%CITY%) Yes, here's another one of these rumors for today. According to %PERSON%, %COMPANY% is expected to put in an offer to buy out the %ADJECTIVE% Canadian software company for $%NUMBER%. Analysts point to a purchase of BlackBerry as a step to establish %COMPANY% in the burgeoning "%BUZZWORD%" market.

    %SOME BLOG% reports via sources within %COMPANY% and from documents obtained by %NEWS AGENCY% that %COMPANY% has already hired %FINANCIAL FIRM% to determine the worth of BlackBerry, although since no offer has been tendered, we might just be talking out of our %ORIFICES%.

    Now, while it's not official that BlackBerry is for sale, reports do look optimistic for the idea of a buyout. From the same report, %COMPANY% is expected to pay up to $%NUMBER% in cash, shares and %FOOD ITEM% for the former tech giant. Some believe that %COMPANY% is planning to purchase BlackBerry for its know-how in the business and phone security area, but it is our opinion that the fact is that %COMPANY% is actually planning on buying BlackBerry because of its patents, which could greatly improve %COMPANY%'s standings in the arena that is "%BUZZWORD%".

    On the other hand, a purchase of BlackBerry may lay inroads for %COMPANY% into %THIRD WORLD COUNTRY%. BlackBerry's popularity in %THIRD WORLD COUNTRY% may transfer over to any products produced by %COMPANY%, from %PRODUCT% to %OTHER PRODUCT%, allowing for %COMPANY% to %METAPHOR% this until-now inaccessible market.

    In the meantime, some other companies who might be looking at BlackBerry for a potential takeover for much the same reasons include %OTHER COMPANY%, %ANOTHER COMPANY% and, of course, %PUNCHLINE%.

    Comments
    "How does one patch KDE2 under FreeBSD?" - Vadim, Moscow
    "BlackBerry gave me %DISEASE%" - iFan75, Cupertino
    "Still too expensive" - %NAME%, Hyderabad
    "I made $5000 just sitting on my **** and posting links to %SOME WEBSITE%. Join me at hxxp://totally.not.a.scam.paypal.gmail.facebook.twitter.m yspace.ru" - Janine, ERROR: Uncaught exception
    Last edited by thurask; 05-18-15 at 02:17 PM.
    05-18-15 01:52 PM
  2. toobs623's Avatar
    Lmfaoooooo
    05-18-15 02:06 PM
  3. dalight13's Avatar
    Pre wrote it for the next rumor?

    Posted from my Canadian PassportSQW100-1/10.3.1.2708
    05-18-15 02:06 PM
  4. thurask's Avatar
    Pre wrote it for the next rumor?

    Posted from my Canadian PassportSQW100-1/10.3.1.2708
    And the next, and the next, and the next...
    dalight13 likes this.
    05-18-15 02:08 PM
  5. dalight13's Avatar
    You're right, forgot my "s" at the end of rumor haha

    Posted from my Canadian PassportSQW100-1/10.3.1.2708
    05-18-15 02:22 PM
  6. tdyhedge's Avatar
    InvalidArgument...NullPointerException...blah, blah, blah. Lol.

    Posted via CB10
    05-18-15 02:53 PM

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