03-15-10 04:56 PM
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  1. Andro_Allen's Avatar
    Hello folks,

    First time to post here.

    I have a for all you parents or whoever can answer my questions. I have my BB through my work. service is AT&T. My 15yr old daughter has hers through verizon. is there a way to geta copy of her text messages to my phone or email. This has been a touchy subject with her and our family and i know you got to let them go sooner or later. Just concerned is all.

    Thanks all
    A
    03-15-10 10:51 AM
  2. thinkamp's Avatar
    Well don't you pay the bill or maybe your wife does?
    You can check all of that online, but you probably have to request a copy of the actual conversation from Verizon.
    Last edited by baberz; 03-15-10 at 11:02 AM.
    03-15-10 10:53 AM
  3. cbrown61's Avatar
    I have read on here somewhere about a program that runs in the background that allows you to moniter everything... but its a touchy subject. The whole invasion of privacy and whether its legal or not....

    here it is: http://forums.crackberry.com/f35/legal-436132/
    03-15-10 10:57 AM
  4. greydarrah's Avatar
    It's your kid and until they turn 18, they have no right to privacy as far as the parents are concerned. I think the only way to get what you want is through some spy ware that you would have to install on her phone. You'd have to try a search here or on google to find something that works.

    I wouldn't worry about legalities. That would only be relevant if you were interested in trying to prosecute her for something you found on her phone.
    03-15-10 11:01 AM
  5. grotty's Avatar
    Can't you and your kid be honest with each other? Imo this is a horrible approach to find out what your kids are up to..parents and children that don't have trust in each other don't have much.. I know this first hand (I am the child). I suggest leaving your kid be a kid.. If you find out they are doing something they shouldn't be then you suspend their phone privelidges.. Just my opinion.. Sorry if it sounded rude

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    03-15-10 11:05 AM
  6. BigBadWulf's Avatar
    Can't you and your kid be honest with each other? Imo this is a horrible approach to find out what your kids are up to..parents and children that don't have trust in each other don't have much.. I know this first hand (I am the child). I suggest leaving your kid be a kid.. If you find out they are doing something they shouldn't be then you suspend their phone privelidges.. Just my opinion.. Sorry if it sounded rude

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    Dang! How'd I grab the wrong quote the first time?

    You either don't have teenagers, or live in a dream world. Trust but verify,




    WAPers do it With A Passion
    If everyone spoke Wulfanese, they wouldn't need to click here for a translation.


    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    03-15-10 11:11 AM
  7. thinkamp's Avatar
    Dang! How'd I grab the wrong quote the first time?

    You either don't have teenagers, or live in a dream world. Trust but verify,
    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com

    That kids parents are tracking him with his bb.
    03-15-10 11:12 AM
  8. BigBadWulf's Avatar
    [/CENTER]
    That kids parents are tracking him with his bb.
    Understood, and I whole heartedly agree on. I'd hate for anyone else to find out what their daughter was up to like I did.



    WAPers do it With A Passion
    If everyone spoke Wulfanese, they wouldn't need to click here for a translation.


    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    03-15-10 11:19 AM
  9. thinkamp's Avatar
    Understood, and I whole heartedly agree on. I'd hate for anyone else to find out what their daughter was up to like I did.



    WAPers do it With A Passion

    If everyone spoke Wulfanese, they wouldn't need to click here for a translation.



    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    Oh you stop that! Atleast I was completely honestly with you!!

    Doesn't that count for something?!
    03-15-10 11:21 AM
  10. syb0rg's Avatar
    Can't you and your kid be honest with each other? Imo this is a horrible approach to find out what your kids are up to..parents and children that don't have trust in each other don't have much.. I know this first hand (I am the child). I suggest leaving your kid be a kid.. If you find out they are doing something they shouldn't be then you suspend their phone privelidges.. Just my opinion.. Sorry if it sounded rude

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    I am a 27 year old male, with a 4 month old daughter.

    make a long ugly story short, i dealt with middle class to lower class kids day in and day out for 3 solid years, all on volunteer work. And today's kids are not the "today's kids" that were 5/10/15 years ago. It's shocking to hear what some of these kids do, what they say, and how they act. If kids worried about being kids, instead of talking/acting/looking/trying to be adults. you'd have a valid argument, but in 2010 it's an invalid argument. and i think it boils back down to parenting.

    I will be the first to tell you that when my daughter hits "cell phone age", the only number she will know is her "google voice" number (if it is still around).... i want to have full control of who/what/where/where and why of her cell phone conversations. I do not trust "today's kids".... i knew what kind of trouble i could of got into, if i didn't have the parents that struck the fear of god into me.... and with Government Social Services, and Child Protects Programs, that view punishment as child abuse.... it's really make me sick to my stomach to see where kids will be in 13-18 years.

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    03-15-10 11:22 AM
  11. GlitchZero's Avatar
    This is literally no different than your boss spying on your phone, and busting you for whatever you do that they see as wrong. Let your kids make mistakes. Yeah, we live in a crazy time with technology, but that doesn't make spying on them ok, or justified. Parents like you guys are the whole reason a country gets away with phone tapping, people disappearing, etc, etc. It kind of makes me sick how far you'll go to 'protect' this generation.

    Clearly, lawn darts didn't clear out enough of the crazies of Generation Y. Despite what kind of bubble you want to create for your kid, they'll either break it and do what they want regardless, or you'll just keep distancing your children from you.

    When you're alone on your deathbed, and your kid won't talk to you, try to remember the name of the spyware that caused that rift.
    Last edited by GlitchZero; 03-15-10 at 11:27 AM.
    03-15-10 11:23 AM
  12. grotty's Avatar
    Hey just saying.. Wait till your kid finds out your trying to pull this crap on them..they will never trust you again I'm sure..my p's used to pull crap like this on me.. And now we have a horrible relationship..I'm being realistic here and not living in a dream world.. If I was in a dream world I'd have a good relationship with my folks

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    03-15-10 11:26 AM
  13. lovemythemes's Avatar
    I fully understand why you wanna track them with every move they make.
    It's disgusting how things are in today's world.
    03-15-10 11:28 AM
  14. BigBadWulf's Avatar
    [/CENTER]
    Oh you stop that! Atleast I was completely honestly with you!!

    Doesn't that count for something?!
    Not you silly, the one who found huge trouble. There's a man in jail for life (168 year sentence), and a twerp in Toronto who got away with far more than he should, because my wife at the time thought our daughter was "honest" with us.



    WAPers do it With A Passion
    If everyone spoke Wulfanese, they wouldn't need to click here for a translation.


    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    03-15-10 11:28 AM
  15. syb0rg's Avatar
    Hey just saying.. Wait till your kid finds out your trying to pull this crap on them..they will never trust you again I'm sure..my p's used to pull crap like this on me.. And now we have a horrible relationship..I'm being realistic here and not living in a dream world.. If I was in a dream world I'd have a good relationship with my folks

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    When i would go out with my friends, i had to tell my parents where i was going. bottom line.

    and my parents would take time out of their day to drive where i claimed to be. If i was there, i got more freedoms.

    if i wasn't there i lost A LOT of freedoms and got in serious trouble.

    Why not be honest about where you are going, who you are talking to, and what you are doing....

    i'm not implying you didn't... but i'm just saying.

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    03-15-10 11:29 AM
  16. rayzryd266's Avatar
    Your child has NO right to privacy till they turn of age or get adjucitated through the courts. At some point, you as the parent will need to put your foot down and act like a parent - not their friend or equavilent. Your responsibilities are for their food, shelter, education and safety (and I'm guessing you have concerns about sex, drugs or the like). If the situation is 'too touchy' as you claim terminate the service and be done with it.
    03-15-10 11:31 AM
  17. GlitchZero's Avatar
    Why not be honest about where you are going, who you are talking to, and what you are doing....
    Why be honest with someone who doesn't trust you to begin with? I'm sorry, but someone who doesn't give me a chance to prove myself, does not deserve my respect or honesty, regardless of whether they're blood related or not.
    03-15-10 11:34 AM
  18. happygirl7973's Avatar
    Well, I am ignoring the above debate because I'm the mom of two teenagers. There is a program called dexrex that you can download. It will, for free, archive all texts received and sent from the phone. Then, you can go online and check them. Pretty simple. It's also free. It's password protected so no one but you can see them.
    03-15-10 11:36 AM
  19. greydarrah's Avatar
    Can't you and your kid be honest with each other? Imo this is a horrible approach to find out what your kids are up to..parents and children that don't have trust in each other don't have much.. I know this first hand (I am the child). I suggest leaving your kid be a kid.. If you find out they are doing something they shouldn't be then you suspend their phone privelidges.. Just my opinion.. Sorry if it sounded rude

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    You're soooo funny. Why don't you try coming back to this thread in 15 or 20 years, when you're no longer the kid, but the parent of a teen yourself. I know...I know...you'll feel the same then as you do now, wont you? Go ahead and roll your eyes. Some kids can be trusted, others need to be checked on.
    03-15-10 11:37 AM
  20. anon4705193's Avatar
    I've seen this come up before, and it seems like such a double-edged sword. On the one hand, I totally understand where you are coming from, even though I am not a parent myself. Today's world is crazy, and you want your child to be protected and not hit with anything that could harm them or they could really get in trouble for and ruin their own reputation/future. However, from the child's perspective (I'm 23 and my parents were, and still are, a little bit overprotective because I am an only child), knowing that there might be something on their phone to spy on them, or reading every message they send, sends a clear message that you don't think they can be trusted. It might be justified (I don't know your particular situation), but if it's just to protect them from "the baddies" out there and they're a good kid, I would say just ask them straight out who they talk to and what they do, and if you think they're lying to you, you do pay for the phone and can just tell them you want to look at the phone and see what is really going on, maybe as a kind of compromise?

    Also, not to start another debate but if your daughter can't be trusted with a blackberry/smartphone (I mean, 15 does seem a little young but that's just me...) maybe move her back to a dumbphone? Or just turn off the texting plan so she can't text if that's the issue?
    Last edited by cdowner; 03-15-10 at 11:44 AM.
    03-15-10 11:42 AM
  21. Mamaluka's Avatar
    Hey A,
    Rather than to spout my input on parenting, or give MY opinion on the morals of what you are about to do (as others have taken the liberty of doing)....I will stick to answering your question, the reason you came here, the reason you joined crackberry.com (as noted by the number 1 on your post couint).
    Try this program out Catch Cheating Spouses with FlexiSPY - Spy Phone, GPS Tracker, Location Tracking, Remote Listening for Mobile / Cell Phones
    it is a little pricey, but well worth it. You can track texts, keystrokes, emails, phone calls, listen in using the phone's microphone and even get recordings of conversations. In other words, you will OWN that phone.
    Good Luck!
    03-15-10 11:42 AM
  22. live2board7's Avatar
    Direct confrontation is a much better solution then secretly spying on them. I'd rather have my parents grab my phone outta my hand and read my texts and yell at me about it then secretly spying on me.

    What are you going to do when you find a text message about (insert bad thing here)? Bring it up to them that you've been secretly compromising their privacy ever since they had a cell phone?

    Kids grew up perfectly fine for the past thousands of years, just because of advances in technology make things like this easier, doesn't mean you have to do it.
    03-15-10 11:42 AM
  23. GlitchZero's Avatar
    Because they are your parents, they gave you life, they given you clothing/food/transportation/love and countless other items and privileges along the road. Why not be the bigger person, and go through life knowing, I've done everything possible to make my mom and dad happy v. living with regret and sorrow in your heart?!?

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    Let me get this straight, I have to be a bigger person because you're a paranoid maniac, who can justify spying on someone? No. Again, thinking like this is why Guantanimo even existed in the first place. I don't live in regret, or with sorrow.

    Let me elaborate a bit though;

    I think if you pay for the phone, do whatever you want. It's your money being used on whatever the kids doing.

    If the kid is paying for it though? Damn right I think it's wrong. You're in their business. Regardless of whether it's in your name or not, they're paying for that service and it is a CRIME. If your kid put up cameras in your house and caught you cheating, because they were suspicious, would you be ok with that? By some of your guys' logic, apparently you would.
    03-15-10 11:43 AM
  24. grotty's Avatar
    When i would go out with my friends, i had to tell my parents where i was going. bottom line.

    and my parents would take time out of their day to drive where i claimed to be. If i was there, i got more freedoms.

    if i wasn't there i lost A LOT of freedoms and got in serious trouble.

    Why not be honest about where you are going, who you are talking to, and what you are doing....

    i'm not implying you didn't... but i'm just saying.

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    Kinda my point exactly... At least you knew they were doing it right? Its one thing to keep tabs on your children but its totally different to spy on them is all I'm saying..I'm done with this I guess..I feel the hole I'm digging for myself with al the elders of CB

    Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com
    03-15-10 11:45 AM
  25. Jude526's Avatar
    Verizon has parenting controls but you have to be on the same plan to do something like that. You can't do it from one carrier to another. I understand wanting to know what your child is doing. If you don't trust your child, then they shouldn't have a cell phone to begin with. I see young kids all the time with cell phones and BB. I also see how some kids are so rude to their parents....if I had been that way with my parents......
    I would like to think there are some good kids out there, but the ones I see and deal with daily are not so great. They shoplift, destroy property that isn't theirs, run havoc in the malls. It begins with open communication and being a real PARENT. Kids today get too much handed to them. No respect for their elders anymore. Dressing like they are trying to get attention and the wrong attention.
    I am glad I don't have these worries and if I did, my kid would not have a cell phone. I don't care what their friends have. Show me you can be responsible and trustworthy........I see moms and daughters fighting all the time. So a lot of this is on parent's shoulders and it does begin at home.
    I caught two teens shoplifting and one of them was such a little brat. She didn't care and her father commented by saying KIDS WILL BE KIDS so this is what will be leading our country? Scary
    03-15-10 11:56 AM
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