[alleycat0124]

Ok so how can I stop them from using technology that I don't even understand.

If you don't understand the technology, you need to learn. If that's beyond your reach you need to find someone who can guide you, for example, a site like this, and then, TAKE THE ADVICE YOU'RE GIVEN.

Ask yourself, despite all your arguments to the contrary, do you not think that willfully allowing porn into the hands of underage kids is not the responsibility of the government and MORALLY wrong?

The role of our Government is not to dictate morality. You're thinking of some other country.

And BTW I do take care to speak to him about sex and what is right and wrong. What else can I do?

He stole from you. He violated your trust. He did what you perceive to be morally wrong. Think it might be time to start parenting and stop hoping the Government will do it for you?

Just a thought.

BTW, you might try Googling "Content Filters for Blackberry." I didn't find very many results, but then, I'm not really looking very hard.

[bmfan]

the fact that you think he has learned his lesson and wont look at porn again is laughable ...

[Reed McLay]

check his text messages in a few weeks. I am willing to bet there are a few pictures in there...

That is why we suggest restricting text to SMS. No pictures.

[dlgus]

Websense.com — Web Filter



The product exists, but it not suitable for a single client to use. Licencing starts at 50 subscriptions.

Not for nothing, but wouldn't the SIMPLER solution be to be a parent? She doesn't say what provider she is on, but why NOT just call her provider and ask if they have parental filters that she can place on it, or failing that, just REMOVE the ability to go online?

I think she's been given some very good advice here, and her response is that 'it's not HER responsibility'--which is a massive parental cop-out. If a parent gives a child something that can be abused, it is the PARENT'S job to monitor the usage.

[Bogie09]

If you're that concerned, cancel his blackberry data plan

Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com

[Blue Shift]

Ask yourself, despite all your arguments to the contrary, do you not think that willfully allowing porn into the hands of underage kids is not the responsibility of the government and MORALLY wrong? If it isn't it should be! I can talk to my son and ground him for a year but it's not going to stop other peoples kids. That's why we have government.

It's not my place to determine what is MORALLY wrong for you or your children. It isn't your place to determine what is morally wrong for me and mine. And it most certainly isn't the government's place to tell either of us. YOU have determined that pornography is immoral, it is your responsibility to teach that to your children, and your responsibility to enforce that view. Not mine, not your government's.

[cfreese66]

Take his bb away.

[vanrunner]

...

You don't understand the technology. However, you were able to find this site, create an account, and post repeatedly.

...

I did a search on Blackberry's and this was one of the top sites. I'm not stupid! I just don't don't understand Blackberries. I'm willing to learn though.

[chaszone]

That is why we suggest restricting text to SMS. No pictures.

I didnt know that was possible. Then again I never cared to find out...

Ya See.. we learn something new every day!

Thanks!

[MMORAN03]

It's simple, don't let your 14 year old child have a blackberry! He's 14 I doubt he truly needs one at that age. Unfortunately this falls on you and your child and should be addressed with him instead of trying to ban this on blackberrys everywhere

[chaszone]

I did a search on Blackberry's and this was one of the top sites. I'm not stupid! I just don't don't understand Blackberries. I'm willing to learn though.

That is a great attitude to have. There are a lot of threads here that give tips and tricks, etc. If you have a particular question aside from the current one, use the search feature. If your search is unsuccessful, start a new thread and ask your question. I am sure you will get many helpful answers.

[cfreese66]

This is a great site! I love it!

[XxTRCxX]

Obviously stealing my credit card is the least of my worries.

Wow I thought I'd find more support here. I'm not against free speach or the constitution. I'm just a parent looking for help here. Please be kind.

Have you called your carrier to see if they can do something? I know some carriers have restrictions they can put on your childs phone, and you can manage it from your account online. You can manage things like, restricting when calls/sms/mms/internet can be used, so you could restrict it to certain hours of the day. Also i have a child that is 19 months old, or course not your childs age, but i can honestly say with your child you were giving him the opportunity to show responsibility. Do not pay attention to these other user who obviously have no idea, and just want to act infantile. As a parent you need to give your kids leeway to show they can handle something like a phone, obviously he failed and now your doing something about it. I applaud you. Contact your carrier and let me know what they say.

[danhclare]

... IMO. Give your kid some privacy

Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com

[berryfit]

I still believe that this is not my responsibility as a parent though.
Does nobody else find this extremely scary?

I do agree with your concern, but I have to say, I do not agree with your post above!

It is our responsibility as parents. You can't have GOVERNMENT watch us.

Ok, so if we're not reponsible for this, then you're saying government should be. So then government becomes the parents FOR US?

That in essence is what you are saying. You're saying so you dont have to, the governement should.

Its a much different world out there today than when I was a kid. But with all the really cool things out there ,there are bad. We cant keep the good and ignore the bad or have someone else take care of it for us.

I have a 24 year old son, a 13 year old daughter and two step kids of 14 and 16.

I monitor my kids....my wife doesnt monitor her kids as well. I try, but its not welcome. So every month or so, my wife catches my step daughter doing somthing. /The problem is, she waits till she's doing something, and only addressing that one instance.

Kids WILL Be kids. They will get away with everyhting they can! I did when I was a kid. But the things then were different. Now, with the internet, it's like taking them into the city and setting them off on their own. You just dont do that!!!!!!

You monitor them. you disipline them (a lost art), you talk to them, but you do not in any way shape or form push off your responsibility on the government because it's too hard for you to do!

Take away his phone. Take away the internet on it at least! That doesnt make you MEAN, or unjust or a bad mom. It just makes you the decision maker and ADULT of the household.

In no way is this a flame on you, but you really cant take this or any other problem that OCCURS IN YOUR OWN HOME and put it on the government or others to take care of. We police our own homes.

Good luck!

[chaszone]

BTW, Welcome to the site.... there is A LOT of helpful information here.

in Additoin, trial by fire is always a good one as well. Go and get yourself a Blackberry. First hand use is the best way to learn.

[Reed McLay]

I did a search on Blackberry's and this was one of the top sites. I'm not stupid! I just don't don't understand Blackberries. I'm willing to learn though.

We have worked hard to earn that distinction and to live up to the responsibility it brings.

[dlgus]

Ok so how can I stop them from using technology that I don't even understand. Who am I to say that my son won't one day become the next Bill Gates or something so by taking away his phone I stop that. I don't have the expertise to do determine this, I don't have the resources to hire somebody to help, so I can only rely on the government to help me who I have to assume has the resources to do their due diligence in this issue.

Ask yourself, despite all your arguments to the contrary, do you not think that willfully allowing porn into the hands of underage kids is not the responsibility of the government and MORALLY wrong? If it isn't it should be! I can talk to my son and ground him for a year but it's not going to stop other peoples kids. That's why we have government. Even if nothing happens and I can only bring awareness to this issue to help educate other parents then it's worth it for me. You have no idea how much It hurts me to think my son was even able to contemplate this.

And BTW I do take care to speak to him about sex and what is right and wrong. I didn't say that he KEEPS looking at pornography. I'm sure that after this he won't touch it for a very long time. At some point it will be his moral choice to do this and at that point I can only hope that all the lessons I have taught him and done my best to instill in him will help him make the right decision. What else can I do?

Ok, here is my take on it--contrary to Hillary's viewpoint, it is not YOUR job to decide what MY kid can or cannot 'do' based on YOUR moral viewpoint. And I don't for one second believe that you CARED about whether or not my kid could watch porn on a phone till YOUR kid did it.

Again, I go back to you wanting to be more your child's friend that his parent. You didn't seriously use the 'I could be stopping the next Bill Gates if I take the phone away' argument, did you????

And you should also stop using the "I don't even understand this technology" excuse--my 80 yr old father in law has jumped into the computer age--and if he can learn, then YOU certainly can.

Here is an example from my own life. I do not like rap music.....when MY kid was around the same age as yours he fell in love with rap music--this was during it's 'let's kill the police and all women are wh*res' phase.

He was not allowed to bring into my home, or listen to anything that I had not heard first. And we spent MEGA time talking about what he was listening to, WHY he wanted to listen to it, what he thought about the values the music was putting forth and the ways they differed from the values I taught him. He was not allowed to use 'rap slang' in my presence. If he 'slipped' up, and something came in that was not supposed to, I had NO qualms about stopping it dead in it's tracks.

I LEARNED about rap, because I didn't want THEIR values to be what my son thought was right. The bonus to all of that is that we have a very close relationship.

I get that raising a boy to a man is hard in this day and age, but the man he ends up being is not the job of the gov't.

[berryfit]

By the way...what carrier do you use for his blackberry?

I believe verizon DOES have content filtering by age and subject. You can control most of what he sees and does if you sign up for it and put in the restrictions.

If you don't watn to do that, then you're just looking to make life easier and have someone else do it!

Go gettem!

[XxTRCxX]

I do agree with your concern, but I have to say, I do not agree with your post above!

It is our responsibility as parents. You can't have GOVERNMENT watch us.

Ok, so if we're not reponsible for this, then you're saying government should be. So then government becomes the parents FOR US?

That in essence is what you are saying. You're saying so you dont have to, the governement should.

Its a much different world out there today than when I was a kid. But with all the really cool things out there ,there are bad. We cant keep the good and ignore the bad or have someone else take care of it for us.

I have a 24 year old son, a 13 year old daughter and two step kids of 14 and 16.

I monitor my kids....my wife doesnt monitor her kids as well. I try, but its not welcome. So every month or so, my wife catches my step daughter doing somthing. /The problem is, she waits till she's doing something, and only addressing that one instance.

Kids WILL Be kids. They will get away with everyhting they can! I did when I was a kid. But the things then were different. Now, with the internet, it's like taking them into the city and setting them off on their own. You just dont do that!!!!!!

You monitor them. you disipline them (a lost art), you talk to them, but you do not in any way shape or form push off your responsibility on the government because it's too hard for you to do!

Take away his phone. Take away the internet on it at least! That doesnt make you MEAN, or unjust or a bad mom. It just makes you the decision maker and ADULT of the household.

In no way is this a flame on you, but you really cant take this or any other problem that OCCURS IN YOUR OWN HOME and put it on the government or others to take care of. We police our own homes.

Good luck!

You and i think alike. DO NOT wait till something happens to implement something, or find a solution. Explain to the child what kind of responsibilities come with using a phone and what you expect. If they try to find a way around it, or abuse their abilities then you need to take the proper course of action. I see it too many times everyday where people wait for something to happen to finally do something about it. Not just with parenting, but even in the work force. We are here for all parents, so take this as a learning experience, and i personally will help in any capacity i can to ensure you understand it all. (referring to thread creator)

[redsoxrocker]

if your son is doing things on his blackberry that you don't approve of, it is your responsibility to take the blackberry away from him because you don't agree with that he's doing. even worst, he STOLE your credit card information from you. if a stranger did that to you, i'm sure you'd be FURIOUS! the same should apply to your son. it's your job as a parent to deal with him however you feel appropriate, whether that means grounding him, cutting off his data plan, making him pay for his phone bill, or taking away his blackberry all together.

though i understand your concerns as a parent (i don't have kids and if i did i'm sure it would irk me as well), i don't it's rational to want a blackberry-wide ban on pornography just because your kid is sneaking around watching porn on his device.

not to say that i support pornography (on blackberrys or otherwise), but its not illegal and a lot of blackberry users are of legal, responsible age to do what they want, and just because your son is doing something you don't like, it shouldn't mean that other people should pay for that. the problem appears to be a communication issue between you and your son, not with what videos are allowed to be played on blackberrys.

[bboy2143]

Oooo.. Looking at porn and stealing your mastercard?... Take the phone away and hide your wallet. If he's looking at porn on aberry, give him a simple phone like a krzr

Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com

[Username00089]

Dear Blackberry Community

Recently I caught my 14 year old Son using his Blackberry to view pornographic material using a Adult web site ****** for which he purchased a membership too using my Master Card. I was under the impression that the Telephone companies controlled what sites could be accessed by our phones much the same way as I can control what my Son views on our computer but I was Very Very Wrong! All of his friends use Blackberry's to keep in touch for school and our Church and after taking it away from him for a week I can already see the negative social effect it's had on him.

Now I have no issues with Adults viewing pornography and this is not what this is about. I think we need stronger controls on what is viewable from the Blackberry phones so that we can keep our children away from inappropriate content. There is no net nanny for the IPhone or Blackberry.

If you are against pornography being accessible to your child's cell phone please visit my New Facebook Group "Ban Blackberry Pornography" so that we can show the government that we need safeguards in place for our children's sake.

Thank you,
A Concerned Parent

P.S. In the interest of full disclosure I did receive an apology letter from ***** and a full refund. I'm still not happy that our Telephone companies can let this happen though!

First and foremost, I am not a parent. Nor will I ever be. And because of things like a child being sneaky and stealing a credit card is why I'd rather be dead than to bare the responsibility of being a parent. It's just not worth it (to me).

With that said, I can understand where you're coming from. But to call for some sort of move so that a carrier should spend money to block porn for a 14 year old child's BLACKBERRY WITH A DATA PLAN that his parents pay for is a bit extreme.

I'm sorry but this "Ban on Blackberry Pornography" as you put it is ridiculous.

[venomgirl]

You can ask for a content filter on regular phones to teen 13 & young adult 17...but on a pda...the sky is the limit, afteralll it's the world wide web

[olta777]

You can ask for a content filter on regular phones to teen 13 & young adult 17...but on a pda...the sky is the limit, afteralll it's the world wide web

That's right cause PDAs are meant for adults