[mikeycollins13]

BlackBerry
To our valued customers, partners and fans,
You’ve no doubt seen the headlines about BlackBerry. You’re probably wondering what they mean for the tens of millions of jerks like you who refuse to upgrade to BB10 devices.

We have one important message for you:

You can continue to count us out.

How do we know? We have substantial cash burn on hand and a balance sheet that is debt free with newly minted Z30 Inventory write down Lalapalooza coming!!

We are restructuring with a goal to cut our expenses by 50 percent in order to run a very efficient, customer-oriented organization. We assure you that after this 50% chop, there will be no one left to face customers.

These are no doubt challenging times for us and we don’t underestimate the situation or ignore the challenges. We are making the difficult changes necessary to strengthen BlackBerry’s Air Force like the Global Challenger we purchased in July after we missed earnings and started to fire our staff.

One thing we will never change is our commitment to ruin the brand for those of you who helped build BlackBerry into the most trusted tool for the world’s business professional.
Best in class tools.

You trust your BlackBerry to deliver your most important messages, so trust us when we deliver one of our own: You can continue to count on us as we type this to you from 45,000ft above the jetstream on our Global Challenger Express and look down at those little people we fired so we could get to Lewis Hamilton’s F1 party in Tokyo on a pimping ride of our own.
Sincerely,
The BlackBerry Team

[zee3p0]

In the infamous words "******* parasite"

Posted via CB10

[igor10000]

And the point of this is?

[mikeycollins13]

Sarcasm, humour, wit

[wxmancanada]

I don't really appreciate this, but hey, what's the internet for if not being an



Yes, a donkey.

Donkey Synonyms, Donkey Antonyms | Thesaurus.com

[Spencerdl]

Well, get use to it. I've been around for a few years and Blackberry won't be the first or last company to go out of business....it happens. I would give you a list, but its to long......SMILE

[m1a1mg]

Sure are a lot of BB fans getting upset over anything these days.

[BThunderW]

You wouldn't know good taste if it came up from behind and licked your a$$ with your mother's severed tongue.

BlackBerry
To our valued customers, partners and fans,
You’ve no doubt seen the headlines about BlackBerry. You’re probably wondering what they mean for the tens of millions of jerks like you who refuse to upgrade to BB10 devices.

We have one important message for you:

You can continue to count us out.

How do we know? We have substantial cash burn on hand and a balance sheet that is debt free with newly minted Z30 Inventory write down Lalapalooza coming!!

We are restructuring with a goal to cut our expenses by 50 percent in order to run a very efficient, customer-oriented organization. We assure you that after this 50% chop, there will be no one left to face customers.

These are no doubt challenging times for us and we don’t underestimate the situation or ignore the challenges. We are making the difficult changes necessary to strengthen BlackBerry’s Air Force like the Global Challenger we purchased in July after we missed earnings and started to fire our staff.

One thing we will never change is our commitment to ruin the brand for those of you who helped build BlackBerry into the most trusted tool for the world’s business professional.
Best in class tools.

You trust your BlackBerry to deliver your most important messages, so trust us when we deliver one of our own: You can continue to count on us as we type this to you from 45,000ft above the jetstream on our Global Challenger Express and look down at those little people we fired so we could get to Lewis Hamilton’s F1 party in Tokyo on a pimping ride of our own.
Sincerely,
The BlackBerry Team

[cgk]

I thought this was funny however:

[Dave79]

I thought this was funny however:

That's pretty funny!

[bigglybobblyboo]

BlackBerry
To our valued customers, partners and fans,
You’ve no doubt seen the headlines about BlackBerry. You’re probably wondering what they mean for the tens of millions of jerks like you who refuse to upgrade to BB10 devices.

We have one important message for you:

You can continue to count us out.

How do we know? We have substantial cash burn on hand and a balance sheet that is debt free with newly minted Z30 Inventory write down Lalapalooza coming!!

We are restructuring with a goal to cut our expenses by 50 percent in order to run a very efficient, customer-oriented organization. We assure you that after this 50% chop, there will be no one left to face customers.

These are no doubt challenging times for us and we don’t underestimate the situation or ignore the challenges. We are making the difficult changes necessary to strengthen BlackBerry’s Air Force like the Global Challenger we purchased in July after we missed earnings and started to fire our staff.

One thing we will never change is our commitment to ruin the brand for those of you who helped build BlackBerry into the most trusted tool for the world’s business professional.
Best in class tools.

You trust your BlackBerry to deliver your most important messages, so trust us when we deliver one of our own: You can continue to count on us as we type this to you from 45,000ft above the jetstream on our Global Challenger Express and look down at those little people we fired so we could get to Lewis Hamilton’s F1 party in Tokyo on a pimping ride of our own.
Sincerely,
The BlackBerry Team

Parody? Those sorts of things are frowned upon in these parts...

But, I might give it a go sometime, you never know...

[Darlaten]

After reading the parody - which was brilliant by the way - the first thing I thought of was the opening clip to Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows in which Rufus Scrimegeour says:

“These are dark times, there is no denying. Our world has perhaps faced no greater threat than it does today. But I say this to our citizenry: We, ever your servants, will continue to defend your liberty and repel the forces that seek to take it from you! Your Ministry remains, strong.”

Subtitle the word "Ministry" with "Blackberry", and there you go

[bigglybobblyboo]

I thought this was funny however:

No fun you. Always the Danny Downer..