[mmcpher]

Developing Hot!!!

Trusted sources and unnamed insiders reported today at Research In Motion's Headquarters at Phillip Street in Waterloo, Ontario, that one of the back-up copiers on the fourth floor briefly jammed this morning. A sheet of paper went all shready while winding its way through the copier and got bungled up, causing the copier to produce error messages. Technicians were able to free the damaged paper, but it could not be salvaged and had to be ritually destroyed.

Compounding RIM's difficulties, the technicians got all inky-black stuff on their hands, so that soap and water had to be applied, then rinsed off, followed by a drying procedure which is believed to have involved either towling or one of those noisy air blowers.

RIM executives have refused to comment on the incident. There is no guarantee that the copier, or conceivably other copiers at RIM, might, in the future be subject to jams. RIM's refusal to acknowledge or address in detail this morning's cascading catastrophe calls into further doubt, the future viability of the company.

[pcgizmo#IM]

LMAO....has BGR said if this is the final nail in RIM's coffin???

[rrrebo]

*applause*
*like*
*thank*

Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com

[leftypepper716]

I'm glad you can make fun of real people who've invested in RIMM, only to keep losing a huge amount of money. A person who bought RIMM stock in June 2008 @ 148.13 a share now sees his investment dwindled to a paltry $26.36 a share. Jim Balsillie and Mike Lazaridis and other higher up exec's will be fine, but REAL people invest in companies also, not just Wall Street "Fat Cats". People's RIMM investments have lost them REAL money, life savings. and by the way, The Wall Street Journal has been around since 1889, let's see how long RIM will be around. Do me a favor and e-mail your joke to a current working stiff getting by RIMM investor, I'm sure he'll find it very funny.

[mmcpher]

I'm glad you can make fun of real people who've invested in RIMM, only to keep losing a huge amount of money. A person who bought RIMM stock in June 2008 @ 148.13 a share now sees his investment dwindled to a paltry $26.36 a share. Jim Balsillie and Mike Lazaridis and other higher up exec's will be fine, but REAL people invest in companies also, not just Wall Street "Fat Cats". People's RIMM investments have lost them REAL money, life savings. and by the way, The Wall Street Journal has been around since 1889, let's see how long RIM will be around. Do me a favor and e-mail your joke to a current working stiff getting by RIMM investor, I'm sure he'll find it very funny.

I guess you didn't get it. If the tech and financial press wouldn't over-react and pile on with each new rumor, speculation, theory, etc., about RIM's future, maybe the assessment of its value, and that of their products, would be more rational. That would allow investors to make more rational decisions, rather than trying to gauge just how far afield the tech and financial press will go, and how their lurching "news" coverage might impact stock price in the short term. The WSJ has been around for a long time, although not always under its present ownership. You could look it up.

[CranBerry413]

Yes, this was an absolute classic Piece. You sir, deserve a Daytime Emmy. Much Thanks for your work.

Lefty, seriously...as an investor in RIMM, I find this to be Hilarious. No one who does so without knowing the risks involved. Stocks fluctuate, I don't lose any sleep over this sort of thing.

Second, the WSJ is so slanted, the letters slide right off the Page. They have been an incredibly biased newspaper for years, and to be frank, they're more in danger than RIMM, because Newspaper is a truly dying Media Form.

Lighten up, laugh a little, and CHILL. I don't know who gave you the mission to convince us that RIM is a dead company, and I really don't care.

I got the message, as did the rest of us. We hear all of the Bad news, we see it, we have committed it to memory. Thank you for your Service, now please calm down. We know you're dedicated to BlackBerry, just have Faith.

Again, mmcpher this was a classic. Keep up the good work.

Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com

[John.P]

I'm glad you can make fun of real people who've invested in RIMM, only to keep losing a huge amount of money. A person who bought RIMM stock in June 2008 @ 148.13 a share now sees his investment dwindled to a paltry $26.36 a share. Jim Balsillie and Mike Lazaridis and other higher up exec's will be fine, but REAL people invest in companies also, not just Wall Street "Fat Cats". People's RIMM investments have lost them REAL money, life savings. and by the way, The Wall Street Journal has been around since 1889, let's see how long RIM will be around. Do me a favor and e-mail your joke to a current working stiff getting by RIMM investor, I'm sure he'll find it very funny.

And people that ditched their stocks when Apple hit their low $4/share area, investors warned not to buy Apple, etc... - I'm sure they're kicking themselves now.

[Snick Snack]

Developing Hot!!!

Trusted sources and unnamed insiders reported today at Research In Motion's Headquarters at Phillip Street in Waterloo, Ontario, that one of the back-up copiers on the fourth floor briefly jammed this morning. A sheet of paper went all shready while winding its way through the copier and got bungled up, causing the copier to produce error messages. Technicians were able to free the damaged paper, but it could not be salvaged and had to be ritually destroyed.

Compounding RIM's difficulties, the technicians got all inky-black stuff on their hands, so that soap and water had to be applied, then rinsed off, followed by a drying procedure which is believed to have involved either towling or one of those noisy air blowers.

RIM executives have refused to comment on the incident. There is no guarantee that the copier, or conceivably other copiers at RIM, might, in the future be subject to jams. RIM's refusal to acknowledge or address in detail this morning's cascading catastrophe calls into further doubt, the future viability of the company.

Thank you for giving me the best laugh of the day!! I hope you don't mind if I copy and share it in my emails!

[andyahs]

I'm glad you can make fun of real people who've invested in RIMM, only to keep losing a huge amount of money. A person who bought RIMM stock in June 2008 @ 148.13 a share now sees his investment dwindled to a paltry $26.36 a share. Jim Balsillie and Mike Lazaridis and other higher up exec's will be fine, but REAL people invest in companies also, not just Wall Street "Fat Cats". People's RIMM investments have lost them REAL money, life savings. and by the way, The Wall Street Journal has been around since 1889, let's see how long RIM will be around. Do me a favor and e-mail your joke to a current working stiff getting by RIMM investor, I'm sure he'll find it very funny.

There are far too many serious threads you can comment on about RIM's stock fate, this was a good attempt at easing the tension here. Ease up....

[ACFP3]

I'm glad you can make fun of real people who've invested in RIMM, only to keep losing a huge amount of money. A person who bought RIMM stock in June 2008 @ 148.13 a share now sees his investment dwindled to a paltry $26.36 a share. Jim Balsillie and Mike Lazaridis and other higher up exec's will be fine, but REAL people invest in companies also, not just Wall Street "Fat Cats". People's RIMM investments have lost them REAL money, life savings. and by the way, The Wall Street Journal has been around since 1889, let's see how long RIM will be around. Do me a favor and e-mail your joke to a current working stiff getting by RIMM investor, I'm sure he'll find it very funny.

Its a good opportunity for people to get in on RIM (Im Canadian) and like stated above stock market is a risk. A lot of money to make and a lot of money to loose. The Tech sector is very risky and fluctuates often and the people who made the decision to buy when it was @148 should get better analysts. Just my honest opinion.

[Rootbrian]

Hahahahahaha!!!!!!! Even shopper's drug mart, other companys and FedEx's copiers also are subject to jams! Even my fax/scanner/copier jammed! The school's copier always jammed! Paper finds it's way around or just happens to go wherever it feels. THIS DOESN'T AFFECT A COMPANY AT ALL!

...I sense a deliberate troll thread...

Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com

[kolonji]

bwahahahahahahahahahhahahahhaha .. CLASSIC!

smdh @ some of the replies

[pcgizmo#IM]

Hahahahahaha!!!!!!! Even shopper's drug mart, other companys and FedEx's copiers also are subject to jams! Even my fax/scanner/copier jammed! The school's copier always jammed! Paper finds it's way around or just happens to go wherever it feels. THIS DOESN'T AFFECT A COMPANY AT ALL!

...I sense a deliberate troll thread...

Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com

Do you ever post anything that makes sense??

[rrrebo]

OP, you should totally submit this to The Onion!

[Jake2826]

hahaha. Nice post.

[southlander]

And people that ditched their stocks when Apple hit their low $4/share area, investors warned not to buy Apple, etc... - I'm sure they're kicking themselves now.

Lol. Yeah I convinced my girlfriend to sell her Apple at $85 when the iPhone 1 hit. She had paid like $30 for it. Good profit. I was telling her how there were lots predicting it would flop due to no keyboard. And the stock had been pumped by speculation in the run up to the release. So how'd that turn out... heh.

[branflakes]

So, does this mean the Bold 9900 will be delayed til November now???????

[sleepngbear]

I have it on good authority that copiers at Google corporate offices never jam. And they can browse the web and run Flash. Oh, wait ...

And the copiers at Apple never jam either, as long as you don't push the button a certain way.

Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com

[Rootbrian]

Do you ever post anything that makes sense??

Yes, I do. But on that post, I should say, I was a bit buzzed. But sarcasm was also used...

Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com

[menaknow]

Yes, this was an absolute classic Piece. You sir, deserve a Daytime Emmy. Much Thanks for your work.

Lefty, seriously...as an investor in RIMM, I find this to be Hilarious. No one who does so without knowing the risks involved. Stocks fluctuate, I don't lose any sleep over this sort of thing.

Second, the WSJ is so slanted, the letters slide right off the Page. They have been an incredibly biased newspaper for years, and to be frank, they're more in danger than RIMM, because Newspaper is a truly dying Media Form.

Lighten up, laugh a little, and CHILL. I don't know who gave you the mission to convince us that RIM is a dead company, and I really don't care.

I got the message, as did the rest of us. We hear all of the Bad news, we see it, we have committed it to memory. Thank you for your Service, now please calm down. We know you're dedicated to BlackBerry, just have Faith.

Again, mmcpher this was a classic. Keep up the good work.

Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com

Honestly I couldn't have said it better myself.

[pcgizmo#IM]

Yes, I do. But on that post, I should say, I was a bit buzzed. But sarcasm was also used...

Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com

I have yet to read anything that didn't make me but I suppose anything is possible.

[BoldtotheMax]

Good stuff here in the midst of all these doom and gloom threads!

Thanks!

Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com

[pcgizmo#IM]

Good stuff here in the midst of all these doom and gloom threads!

Thanks!

Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com

I'm surprised the wet blanket patrol hasn't closed this thread...it's not news or a rumor!

[BoldtotheMax]

Maybe not, just was good for a laugh!

Posted from my CrackBerry at wapforums.crackberry.com

[BluCheze]

Breaking News:
Sources at RIMM indicate that their newly order copier has been delayed for another week! When contacted for comment, CEO Mike Lizar and Jim Ballsille cited unforeseeable change in copier specification as the reason of the delay.